[Political Junkie Too]

It's like trying to call a credit card company to report a stolen card or fraudulent transaction when time is of the essence:

• Me: Dials 800 number

• CC: You have reached __________. For Español, press 2. For all other calls, press 1 or remain on the line.

• Me: Presses 1

• CC: beep beep beep... This call may be recorded for training purposes. For identification, please enter the full 16-digit number on your credit card.

• Me: enters number

• CC: beep beep beep... Please enter the last 4 digits of your social security number.

• Me: enters number

• CC: beep beep beep... Please enter your 5-digit ZIP code.

• Me: enters number.

• CC: Did you know that for most calls you can resolve your issues on-line at our website? I can send you a link to our website via a text message. Please note that standard data rates may apply. For yes, press 1. For no, press 2.

• Me: Presses 2

• CC: We are experiencing a high volume of calls. If you would like, we offer a call-back service where you can enter your 10-digit telephone number and an agent will call you back. You will not lose your place in line. If you would like a call-back, press 1. If you wish to remain on the line, press 2.

• Me: Presses 1

• CC: We are pleased to offer you a special cash back discount on purchases greater than $500. Go to www._____.com to find out more. Please remain on the line for the next available customer service agent. The expected wait time is 1 second.

• CC: beep beep beep... Hello, my name is Mary. With whom am I speaking?

• Me: States my name.

• Mary: Can you confirm your mailing address?

• Me: States address

• Mary: And your ZIP code?

• Me: States ZIP code.

• Mary: How can I help you today? In case we're disconnected, can you give me your telephone number to call you back?

-PJ

[This_Dude]

Sounds like you’ve done that a time or two

[Does so]

Happened to me yesterday.

My cellphone had broken under warranty, so I went to the AT&T store in my town.

“We don’t fix phones at this AT&T store. Give me your phone number and ZIP code, and I’ll text a list of AT&T repair centers.”

Why didn’t she simply say, “Go to the AT&T repair facility across the street”?

:-/

[Tired of Taxes]

You wrote out literally every single call I make to a business today. It’s only missing the part when I’m disconnected.