I self identify as a sea urchin.
Personally, I’d like to identify as a 5’11 super model from Ukraine or one of those eastern Euro places who produce those ridiculously other-worldly women... but once I realized I couldn’t be Lon Chaney Jr when I was a kid, I had to make peace with the fact that I’m a fun-sized adult who bears a striking resemblance to Barney Rubble.
I could identify as a Russian Gymnast, though. Mary-Lou Retton shaped midget woman, all arms and shoulders.