“selfish”
Ayn Rand used to write about this a lot.
When someone calls you “selfish” what they are really saying is they want to be your master and they want you to be their obedient slave.
These folks are your enemies—now you know.
Further reading:
https://www.amazon.com/Virtue-Selfishness-Fiftieth-Anniversary/dp/0451163931
Excellent recommendation. My husband and children could never be my enemies, but they ARE fools. Fools I still love, but can never completely trust again.