For some men, you are correct.
Just not every man.
It’s the age we live in. We don’t live in an age that values marriage, but an age where the hookup is the primary goal. Women are not going to look at a guy that doesn’t meet the superficial requirements of a desired male, regardless of whatever other qualities he may have.
It’s part of our societal collapse that we are in the middle of.
The key to my approach is that you don’t wait for women to pick you.
You pick what you want and you go after it.
Their first reaction, as you say, will be rejection.
That is step one.
That is where the sense of humor and fun and people skills are needed to get her laughing and keep her attention.
Of course that is best done in person—so social circles are the way to go to make it work.
The secret of life is to be fully aware of all the difficulties, and then plot a strategy to overcome them.
Men can date way above where they “should” if they are strategic about it.