Living near the Lower Ohio River, I’d MUCH rather fall into a deep lake than that river. The whirlpools and current of a medium or large river can overcome even powerful swimmers. Plus you can get bonked by debris. Biggest one I ever swam across was the Current River in MO, at moderate flow, in some fairly fast water, but no whirlpools. I was young and stupid, but not so stupid as to not learn never to try that again. I ended up about 40 yards downstream from the point I thought I could make on the opposite bank, and I was a fairly good swimmer.
As for the toilet, geez, even I’m not that mean! ;-)
“...bonked by debris...”
See? That’s what I’m sayin’! That’s going to be on my Tombstone if Beau has his way and hog-ties me and gets me on a boat.
I’m just trying to save my family a lot of heartache when I die under suspicious circumstances. ;)