I used to have my voicemail message as something like this-
Aight, here’s what’s gonna happen. You’re gonna hear a beep. Then you’re gonna speak your piece. Then I’m gonna listen to it and maybe I’ll call you back. Capice? Here comes the beep...
Meh I was young and it felt funny.
If your team was victorious, press won.
If you want directions, press to.
If you're an arborist, press tree.
If you're in favor, press for.
If you're a beekeeper, press hive.
If you have more than one ill person, press sicks.
If you're Swedish, press Sven.
If you've had a meal, press ate.
If you're German and want to say no, press nein.
If you're a WWII Japanese fighter pilot, press zero.
If you're an astronomer, press star.
If you're British and are ringing for money, press pound.
I'd get calls from people asking me to not answer the phone so they could have their friend hear the outgoing message!