“But I’m very old-fashioned in certain ways...”
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I believe you to be displaying a great deal of Common Sense.
My current (last, please, dear LORD) marriage is in its 33rd year.
We had a very quiet civil marriage then a blessing of the marriage.
Depending upon the circumstances of the bride (young widow, perhaps?) I can see a cream-white dress with floral colors providing the extra touch.
3rd, as was mine.....quiet is best and dignified is even better.
Some of us take several tries to get it correct.
I have no problem with ‘several tries’ - I don’t believe that we are put here to be condemned for earthly life to one or two mistakes; and I’m very glad that you finally found The One.
White is not an easy ‘color’ for most women beyond a certain young age to wear, anyway.
Cream, ivory, beige are more flattering to most.