Posted on 05/06/2021 5:50:17 PM PDT by nickcarraway
Dear Reader:
The Associated Press Stylebook, aka the Bible of journalism, has decreed that the word “mistress” shall no longer be used by journalists because “it implies the woman is solely responsible for the affair.”
Instead — and much to the relief of unfaithful men everywhere — we are to use “friend,” “companion,” or — if we dare — “lover.”
How many divorce actions, filed for the cause of adultery, will use those terms? “Mrs. Jones found out Mr. Jones was keeping Stankyho, a long-term friend, in a New York apartment for 10 years.” Nope, the legalese will say “long-term mistress” because that’s what Stankyho is.
A mistress is, by definition, sexually involved with a married man, and is almost always compensated in some form, whether with money, jewelry or new tires. The relationship has a transactional quality that friends, companions, even lovers, do not share.
For example, I love my friend Carrie, but I don’t pay her rent. A widower and widow may be longtime companions, but nobody’s committing adultery so therefore, the woman is not a mistress.
Twitter users had fun with it: “He left his wife for his friend, because she was much friendlier.”
“The synonym for mistress is ‘homewrecker’.” “The preferred phrase is ‘Sugar Baby.’”
Back in the day, you weren’t a newspaper reporter if you didn’t memorize E.B. White and William Strunk’s “Elements of Style.” (Yes, the same E.B. White who wrote “Charlotte’s Web” and “Stuart Little.”)
Now most news outlets use AP style, which has plenty of quirks. And by quirks, I mean “huh?”
• Put movie and book titles in quotes. Also songs, TV shows, computer games, poems, speeches and works of art. Do not, however, use quotes for the names of magazines, newspapers or the Bible. This rule, I am certain, led to my first ulcer in 1986.
• What time is it? Always use numerical figures except for noon/midnight. “The sky fell at two o’clock” has a certain ring to it, but alas, is incorrect.
• For numbers less than ten, spell it out. Anything above, use numerals. Thus, you are seven years old on Jan. 15, 2022.
• Capitalize president only as a formal title before one or more names, i.e., President Barack Obama. In other usage, it’s always lowercase. “The president will make an announcement tomorrow, after eating his Wheaties.”
• For numbered addresses, always use figures. Abbreviate Ave., Blvd., and St. and directional cues when used with a numbered address. (Jackie Onassis lived at 1040 Fifth Ave.) Never abbreviate alley, drive and road. If a street name is a number, spell out First through Ninth and use figures for 10th and higher. (My brother lives at 203 South Third St., NW.) Does your head hurt yet?
• For ages, use numerals. If the age is used as an adjective or as a substitute for a noun, then it should be hyphenated. Don’t use apostrophes when describing an age range. I was a 26-year-old bride (and late bloomer.) My ex-husband was allegedly in his 30s.
• Use figures for any distances over 10. For any distances below 10, spell out the distance. Examples: I used to run five miles a day, or 35 miles a week, before every body part below my waist collapsed.
• Always use a person’s first and last name on first reference, then only last names on second reference. Don’t use courtesy titles such as Mr., Mrs., Miss or Ms. unless they are part of a direct quotation or you’re writing about Miss Piggy.
• Do you know the eight states that are NEVER abbreviated? Alaska, Hawaii, Idaho, Iowa, Maine, Ohio, Texas and Utah. You’re welcome.
Pedophile will soon be a ‘Child Mentor’.
with benefits!
How about “Undocumented Guardian?”
Is there a French version of the AP stylebook and if so have they disallowed the word paramour?
Or do the French get a pass when it comes to disassociating their language from reality?
It goes something like "Wokety-woke, wokety-woke, my feelings, wokety-woke,"
To reign: To rule (< Latin: regnum, rex)
To rein in: To apply reins (attached to the bridle of a horse); metaphorically: to restrain.
Class dismissed!
Regards,
Why is the birth rate at an all-time low?
Because men are driven by their own biology to engage in behavior which, throughout most of time, has tended to result in reproduction.
Or are you attempting to imply that the current low birth rate in most Western countries refutes Darwin?
Regards,
Maybe it’s just me! Not once did I ever screw around on a woman! I’m even talking about the women I had yet to solidify the relationship with. Oh... I had opportunities. But, to me, it came down to the manner of your character. Look at yourself in the mirror. Are you “honest” or “dishonest”. Are you “loyal” or “disloyal”. I look at myself in the mirror and I am not ashamed. I may be an old geyser now, but I’ve NEVER been a dishonest disloyal scumbag... and I find that something to be proud of.
“Friend”—that’s rather ambiguous and unimaginative. Should be “side action.”
“I believe a euphemism from the past was “great and good friend.”
Edith Wharton in “The Age of Innocence” refers to a man’s mistress relationship as “an alternate establishment”.
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