Only stupid civilizations want themselves to be discovered. When one looks how species operate one can easily see that the “Independence Day” scenario is much more likely than the “Day The Earth Stood Still” one.
The idea that technologically advanced civilizations would be kinder than less advanced ones has no basis in observation.
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See Cixin Liu’s “Dark Forest”, book two of the Three Body Problem” series. This is the corollary to Fermi’s Paradox “Where is every body?”
Also see Stephen Hawking warning:
https://www.sciencealert.com/stephen-hawking-warns-that-we-might-not-want-to-reach-out-to-aliens
Greg Bear’s novels “The Forge of God” and “Anvil of Stars” are based on those concepts.