Posted on 01/19/2021 7:48:39 PM PST by Beowulf9
Brought my mother who is 94 and has intermittent confusion and a possible fall to my house to care for her. In the past 3 weeks she has eaten and drank less and less. Refusing all sorts of food she used to eat, scrambled eggs or eggs of any kind, ensure which she used to drink and like, yogurt, chicken salad sandwich which she used to like and now refuses any food. She stopped eating altogether and drinks one cup of coffee in the morning and that's about it and that coffee is a half a cup is all. She has good teeth and no problem chewing but stays in bed and sleeps off and on all day saying just I want to sleep. She gets up and goes to the bathroom which is right by her bedside about 6 feet away then back to bed.
I had to bring her dog over, a labrador who stays by her side constantly and who she gives all her food to if I leave the room. When I put him out while attempting to feed her she eats only a very small portion and then asks where is the dog. If I bring him in she commences to give him whatever food I brought in.
Today I called 911, had the ambulance come, she refused them to take her blood pressure or listen to her heart at all. I helped put the leads on for an ekg during which she began hitting me, repeatedly while I did, thankfully it was normal sinus rhythm. She kept telling the ambulance people 'no, I'm not going, go away, I'm not doing it, I'm not going, go away' the entire time they were here.
Because she refused to go to the hospital, and she was not having trouble breathing or having a dangerous heart rhythm they did not take her in.
She desperately needs iv fluids, and I would love it if they would pump some iv nutrition into her but I cannot get her to go to the hospital. I do not have Power of attorney and cannot get it here at home but they would not take her if I did based on the findings of her not being in dire health circumstances.
Anyone have any ideas? How to feed? How to get any nutrition in her? I would appreciate any helpful suggestions.
POA does nothing in terms of medical care. You would need to get a guardian appointment. That has to come through the courts. Then you have to “section” her. I had to do that with an aunt.
Once she is in a clinical setting you will have more say with a Healthcare Proxy.
Without that legal paperwork, you are SOL.
My mother is not on any medications.
If she becomes in pain that will change or if she’s super anxious
Some folks are terrified to die
I’m not judging that....I haven’t died yet but almost a half dozen times
Three lives left I say..
She has pain medicine for compression fractures to the back. Takes on a periodic basis as needed.
I’m giving an update though I do not know if anyone will see this but it is better news. Mom came walking out of her room today and said she was hungry! the Remeron is working :) This is a medication the doctor prescribed and takes about 5 days to start to work and we are on the seventh day. I made kraft macaroni and cheese and costco battered cod and she ate a true plate of food and a half a glass of half and half and a cup of tea. She also had a scrambled egg and half a buttered English muffin for breakfast in the morning. That is the most mom has eaten in a month! She also is very much more lucid which is a heaven scent thing to have a real conversation with mom again.
I am very heartened to see this and honestly I do think all your prayers here very much are helping. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
I am getting the legal paperwork in order but truthfully it scares the heck out of me. She still can walk small distances and as a nurse I have given meds for years, she takes them without difficulty but who knows what is up ahead. I take it day by day and thank goodness I do have some experience with this sort of thing but to be beholden to the court I find frightening. I do not know all that that entails and I do not want to have a ‘boss’ and have to do stuff for someone else. But I see no choice.
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