Yo momma so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said “Sorry, no professionals”
Yo momma so ugly she looked out the window and got arrested for mooning
Yo momma so ugly just after she was born, her mother said “What a treasure!” and her father said, “Yeah, let’s go bury it”
Yo momma so ugly they didn’t give her a costume when she tried out for Star Wars
Yo momma so ugly she gets 364 extra days to dress up for Halloween.
Yo momma so ugly when she walks into a bank, they turn off the surveillance cameras
Yo momma so ugly her mom had to be drunk to breast-feed her
Yo momma so ugly her mom had to tie a steak around her neck to get the dogs to play with her
Yo momma so ugly when she walks down the street in September, people say, “Damn, is it Halloween already?”
Yo momma so ugly the government moved Halloween to her birthday
Yo momma so ugly she made an onion cry
Yo momma so ugly she tried to take a bath and the water jumped out
Yo momma so ugly Ted Dansen wouldn’t date her!
Yo momma so ugly the NHL banned her for life
Yo momma so ugly that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn’t have to kiss her goodbye
Your momma is so fat that the Equator goes around her.
Your momma is so stupid that a team of proctologists with a searchlight couldn’t find her brain.
Your momma is so fat that an elephant tried to mate with her, and couldn’t
Your momma is so fat that when she tried to dance the “Bunny Hop”, she went through the floor
Your momma is so fat that she’s been banned from every “All You Can Eat” buffets in the state
Your momma is so dumb that she couldn’t remember the names of all her kids so she gave them a new Chinese name, “Hey You”.
Your momma is so drunk that she thinks Chuck Schumer looks like Rock Hudson.
Your momma is so drunk that she thinks Stacy Abrams is her “sister by another mother”.
Your momma is so dumb that she thinks an “asteroid” is a medical condition.
Your momma is so dumb that she things “Hillary Clinton” is part of the female anatomy.