We once fished a dead guy out of a slow flowing river. The police had responded to a report of a body face down in the water, but they could not find him. My 3rd man who was part blood hound hacked a trail through the brush and black berries and we pulled his rotting carcus out of the water 10 minutes after we arrived.
Three months before he and his friends were floating down the river on innetubes with a case of beer. The tube with the beer got away from him, so in a frantic attempt to catch up with it... he left his tube and went swimming after it. The problem was, despite being a fat guy with plenty of built in flotation, he was not a good swimmer and went under almost immediately. He was not seen again until we found him 3 months later caught on a snag when the water started to go down.
This situation reminded me of it because he was wearing an Obama T-shirt. The creatures that live in the river had been munching on his rotting bloated body and face so he looked like something from a cheap horror film. We could not tell what he originally looked like, it was kind of a shock to see a picture of what he looked like originally in the newspaper.
A co-worker told Bubba that his wife was being unfaithful everyday at 1:30 in the
afternoon with Bubba’s best friend.
Worried and hurt, Bubba ran home at 1:30 to see if this was true.
He came back to the office contented and relieved.
His co-worker asked him how it went.
“Look,” said Bubba, “don’t start such terrible rumors!
That guy isn’t my best friend... I don’t even know him.”
that’s not funny at all...