Skip to comments.Boy, 11, warned after wearing ‘inappropriate’ Hooters face mask to Fla. school
Posted on 09/22/2020 6:28:03 PM PDT by ConservativeStatement
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Of course, that calls for one of my favorites:
Rules of dating a Drill Instructors daughter
If you pull into my driveway and honk you’d better be delivering a package, because you’re sure not picking anything up.
You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter’s body, I will remove them.
I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. Please don’t take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose his compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object. However, in order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact, come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place to your waist.
I’m sure you’ve been told that in today’s world, sex without utilizing a “barrier method” of some kind can kill you. Let me elaborate, when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I will kill you.
It is usually understood that in order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only word I need from you on this subject is “early.”
I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you cry.
As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process that can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. Instead of just standing there, why don’t you do something useful, like changing the oil in my car?
The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool. Places where there are no parents, policemen, or nuns within eyesight. Places where there is darkness. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka - zipped up to her throat. Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies which features chain saws are okay. Hockey games are okay. Old folks homes are better.
Do not lie to me. On issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless god of your universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind the house. Do not trifle with me.
Be afraid. Be very afraid. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in over a rice paddy near Hanoi. When my Agent Orange starts acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as you pull into the driveway you should exit your car with both hands in plain sight. Speak the perimeter password, announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, then return to your car - there is no need for you to come inside. The camouflaged face at the window is mine.
I’ve been there. I think every USAF Basic male graduate has.
I think we might have had a bit too much at the River Walk.
In that context, owls are wise, so it stands for the wisdom of the lovely ladies that work there...
I cant imagine why such a profoundly unimportant thing would be interpreted as such an outrage by the parents that theyd go to the media with it
They fellas honked the horn in the driveway once. Once.
As for the girls who work for Hooters, my bet is that very few are fortunate enough to have a man for a father, a brother, or any male relative at all. Thats the deal in an exploitative industry.
All sexual depravity is disgusting. Including heterosexual depravity. And lusting upon a woman is sexual depravity, no matter how you want to justify it to yourself. If thine eye offend thee pluck it out.
I can't either!
I think his parents need to be “warned” if they are having their son wear a thing to begin with, let alone to school.
Should have told them his mom brought it home from work.
It is a strip club. Hello.
There are many successful business people today who started out in their first jobs as short order cooks in a Hooters somewhere.
Like wearing a MAGA hat in the 'hood, or any large city...
I call it “The Crying Owl” Restaurant.
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