[Homer_J_Simpson]

Note that the lead story was submitted by Q.

From Washington: The Report of the Paraguay Commission; Mr. Lincoln’s Cabinet Already Arranged – 2
The Excitement in Texas – 2
Terrible Fight among the Indians – 2
Distressing Accident at Long Branch – 2
Arrest of a Supposed Burglar – 2

[Verginius Rufus]

They guessed right on William H. Seward being Lincoln’s Secretary of State, but Lincoln made Edward Bates his Attorney General, later replaced with James Speed.