ALTERNATIVES to toilet tissue:
Paper napkins
Paper towel
baby wipes
facial tissue (Kleenex)
Southwestern Bell’s yellow pages; white pages
crepe paper
newspaper
disposable diapers
large oak leaves
and for really tough guys,
sandpaper.
All good substitutes, just avoid trying to flush them down. Sure to cause sewer pipe back ups. Garbage can works better. Or better yet bury those in kitty litter box after use.
The REAL tough guys would use 3 leafed plants.