I sympathize with your anxiety, and I appreciate your desire to do the right thing by everyone. But as a single, middle-aged caregiver myself, I absolutely ache for your sibling. Caregiving is an all-consuming, often harrowing, 24/7 responsibility that ends only with tremendous loss. Now here she is, alone, exhausted, ill, and faced with losing her home. She must be dealing with unimaginable pain and fear right now. Please, set the money worries aside for a while and make sure she’s okay.I know it seems soon. I am feeling a little rushed by another family member. Although, because I did not live in _____ville as I dubbed the area where they all lived, I have not been as involved with my mother's death/care and emotionally I can sort of separate myself from the property. I think we are rushing DUE to the grief, at least two of us are. That is how we are dealing with it. You gave fantastic advice. Wonder how I can work out a delay...
There's an excellent book, called
The Unexpected Journey of Caring by Donna Thomson and Zachary White, that's helped me a lot. For one thing, I learned that many caregivers lose the ability to "see" the future. I'd noticed that in myself, and thought it was my own personal weakness. It's actually a survival skill. Caregiving may go on for years or it can end tomorrow; your loved one's health can take a sudden turn and your whole life changes in an instant. Caregiving requires you to focus on the present moment, work on the current situation, and block out everything else.
Your sibling has probably gotten used to being unable to plan for the weekend, and now she's suddenly supposed to plan the rest of her life. She probably needs time to rebuild the self-care skills that she lost while caring for others.