the laws strongly protect women from bad males (alimony, child support, jail, split of assets, shame etc) but almost nothing from poor behaving women - in fact they actually get rewards (child support, alimony, split of assets, child custody, sympathy, etc).
Lots of people believe that. But that's not really the case - at least not in my state. In my state, the court doesn't care whether you're a woman or man. It bases decisions on these other factors:
(1) The higher-earner pays alimony, whether man or woman.
These days, many women earn more than their husbands, and those women pay alimony.
(2) If the receiver remarries or moves in with an S/O, the alimony stops.
(3) Whoever stays with the children receives primary physical custody, and the other parent pays child support.
Some fathers have primary custody. But I noticed most divorced fathers want only visitation. They'd rather pay child support and keep their freedom.
(4) Whoever remains in the house may continue to live there, but must cough up half the equity in the house (thus reducing the alimony) and take over the mortgage payments.
(5) What's also split in half is debt - even debt hidden by one spouse from the other. It's very difficult to prove debt is cheating debt. (Many a cheating husband has driven his wife into financial ruin this way.)
Of course, your lawyers probably told you all these things and more. The point is, divorce isn't as clear cut as many here believe.
nice women choose the bad boys on purpose
It looks to me as if nice guys choose the bad girls. Anyway, somehow, too many nice girls end up with bad guys, and too many nice guys end up with bad women. And that's a shame. Sometimes you don't really know about a person until much later.
Sorry, but here are the facts. 75% of divorces are initiated by women in the US, 90% of child support is paid by men and 97% of alimony is paid by men. Yes, the laws in theory are neutral in most states but judges have extremely broad discretion and generally speaking the only way a man can get custody of his kids is if the wife doesn’t want them (party girl) or can be proved beyond a doubt that they are drug addicts. Alimony is the same way, despite the fact that women make the most money in 35% of households today, only 3% of alimony payers are women.
Complete and utter BS. While I'm sure there are a smattering of men out there like this, most dont aggressively pursue because the legal cost and time can run into the multiple five or even 6 digits with just a very small chance of success and the wife frequently will threaten to go after more assets, alimony and child support if the guy doesn't give up custody. A friend of mine who paid all the bills spent over $50k trying to get his kids, and his wife was a train-wreck alcoholic and pill popper with severe depression mental history, and the wife was still granted custody with only weekend visitation for my friend.