I was raised by a black women. She was a baby-sitter and maid. I also had a mother and father and lots of siblings. But this women hated black power. It was back when black power was a thing. She hated being called black. She said she was not black, she was brown. And I was to call her a Negro. That was her preference. I was never to call her black. And African American was not yet a thing.
Later, I worked with a women who worked with the mayors office in Chicago before joining our company. She had a similar feeling. But she explained that the black community was not African American. She was all American. And she also pointed out that there were black people and there were N***rs. The second group never worked, stole stuff and did drugs. Chris Rock explains the exact same thing in his HBO special.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MXo89RhSCrw
I’ve known some white folks that acted like the blacks that don’t work, steal stuff and do drugs. I consider them the same word. I just don’t say it.