As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his cell phone rang. Answering, he heard his wife's urgent voice warning him, "Herman, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on Interstate 77. Please be careful!”
"Hell!" said Herman, "It's not just one car. It's hundreds of ‘em!"
Agnes and Gladys were together in Agnes’ car going out to have dinner. Gladys thought she noticed Agnes driving through a red light, but she wasn’t sure. She did notice the next missed red light and hoped that Agnes didn’t mean to, but she determined she would speak up if it happened again. Sure enough, she drove right through another one.
“Agnes”, Gladys exclaimed, “That’s the third red light you’ve driven through!”
“Oh my God!”, Agnes cried, “Am I driving?!”