** I was raised Catholic, but**
Once you are baptized a Catholic — you are always a Catholic. Call your nearest Catholic Church for help. They may have a class for people like you who have relative who are dying.
Sit down with the priest — make an appointment. One bad Pope does not destroy the entire Catholic Church.
Find a good priest, go to Confession, have him give you a blessing, go to Holy Communion!!! It will not remove all of your sadness but you will receive strength - (I’ve been there, will pray for you)