You forgot about the extraterrestrial involvement, and that completely undermines your idea, which otherwise seems strong.
He is on a yacht owned by Aristotle Onassis and spends his time playing cards with JFK. Kurt Cobain plays the guitar for them and bigfoot stands guard at the door
Excuse me!!?? The Pacific Northwest. Bigfoot!?
My kids LOVED the following book (we live near Seattle, camping, etc. Bigfoot stories around the campfire...)
“Sasquatch”, a novel written by Roland Smith.
(Mt. Saint Helens, Lava Tube Caves, Bigfoot, D.B. Cooper, etc.)
I’m offering for sale genuine DB Cooper autographed currency. A must for the discriminating collector.