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When You Lose People You Love
01-02-2018 | Me

Posted on 01/02/2018 2:56:46 AM PST by KJC1

2017 was a great year, politically. But it was a devastating year for me personally. Just tonight, I got a call that one of my other best friends passed away. I've lost 2 best friends in 6 months. I know God is in charge, but it still hurts.

They were both retired cops, one of them was a Viet Nam vet.

My heart is broken.


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To: KJC1

Sorry for your loss. The only thing that I have found helpful is that the ones you loved live in your heart. You can do kindness in their names and they are with God. But you will always miss them.


21 posted on 01/02/2018 4:26:27 AM PST by JayGalt (Let Trump Be Trump)
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To: Rocky

There is definitely life beyond the grave. I went to my friend’s gravesite after he passed, and felt NOTHING. I knew right then he wasn’t there, he was in Heaven. It was a 2 hour drive, but he wasn’t there. I’m still grieving, then got the news earlier about my other dear friend. He’s with our Heavenly Father as well, but I still miss them here.


22 posted on 01/02/2018 4:26:59 AM PST by KJC1 (Illegals: One hand out and the other one flipping us the bird)
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To: Rockingham

I am so sorry. I send my prayers for you and your friend and his family.


23 posted on 01/02/2018 4:30:06 AM PST by KJC1 (Illegals: One hand out and the other one flipping us the bird)
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To: KJC1

I can relate with your sadness. Today, my wife and I will travel to visit a very close friend, more than likely for the last time, who is resting at home waiting for the Lord to take him home. Suffering from cancer, he is like a brother and losing him will be devastating to many.


24 posted on 01/02/2018 4:34:44 AM PST by DaveA37
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To: cyclotic

That is a terrible situation; I offer my prayers to your family as well.


25 posted on 01/02/2018 4:37:14 AM PST by KJC1 (Illegals: One hand out and the other one flipping us the bird)
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To: DaveA37

Prayers for you and your family. It’s not easy, that’s for sure.


26 posted on 01/02/2018 4:41:28 AM PST by KJC1 (Illegals: One hand out and the other one flipping us the bird)
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To: KJC1

Do what you can for those you love while they are still with you. That way when they are gone you will have happy memories and no regrets.


27 posted on 01/02/2018 4:44:12 AM PST by shoff (Vote Democrat it beats thinking!)
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To: KJC1; All

Sorry for your losses.

God gave us feelings. We surely love and grow attached to some people throughout our lives.

I used to have tremendous overwhelming feelings of loss when loved ones died, carried the loss for many years, stuck in grief and how it effected me. But really getting into scripture and full on trusting God has purposes and the greater plan for why any of us are even here or interacting for whatever length of time with those we do through our lives has some how changed my perspective in recent years and now I am just grateful to have met, known to whatever degree, and shared various parts of life with those people.

I feel loss, but choose to focus more on why did God have us know each other and keep that in mind. We are here to serve God, or serve our self. I’m trying to remember it’s about His plans and purposes and that brings me peace and even great joy to have had a part in what God is doing in the big picture through that person having lived and even times through their illness or accidental death.

My family all seemed to cherish and really communicate it more this recent holiday season because medical experts say my mom should not have even been here, yet she fights on, she gives us strength and shows great peace and thoughtfulness toward others as she makes her way over, under, around hurdles of health challenges and walks (shuffles) whatever more time God has for her.

God is good all the time - even in the trials and the losses - which we had many in 2017 in family connections and friends.

All I can say is cherish the memories and strive to find ways to bring the good (God things or qualities) your loved ones exampled a step further in the lives of those who knew them and beyond.

peace.


28 posted on 01/02/2018 4:46:56 AM PST by b4me (God Bless the USA)
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To: KJC1; All

I’m sorry about Your losses. I will Pray for You as well as Your Friends.

I’ve lost many Loved Ones over the years. Missing Them never seems to stop.

My Father to a disease We never heard of, Wegners Granumatosis. One of My Best Friends and My second Wife to cancer after taking care of both of Them. My current Wife’s Uncle to cancer, Aunt and Mother to old age and My Mother most recently as well.

I get through it all by knowing that They are in a better place and no longer in pain.

Prayers to All Posting on this Thread for Their losses.


29 posted on 01/02/2018 4:54:58 AM PST by mabarker1 (Progress- the opposite of congressl)
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To: KJC1

I Am sorry for your loss. This is tough. God will see you through it.


30 posted on 01/02/2018 5:01:38 AM PST by sauropod (I am His and He is mine.)
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To: KJC1

I am so very sorry for all of your losses. Long ago, when I lost someone, the best thing I was told was that each person with whom you interact changes you. A good reason to stay among good people. But in that change, the other person lives on in you. And as you tell people about them, you cause them to carry that person as well. So as long as someone remembers them, they do live on. So, if you can, tell us about this last person that you lost. What was their character? Their strengths? Their accomplishments. Let us remember them with you, and hold them that much longer. We all carry so many good people with us every day of our lives.


31 posted on 01/02/2018 5:02:50 AM PST by mairdie
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To: KJC1

Very sorry for your loss. We had a bad year as well, losing two close family members and a young family friend. We stand strong in prayer, and we know that the losses are simply part of the Lord’s great plan, but still, it hurts. May God bless you and yours.


32 posted on 01/02/2018 5:21:38 AM PST by Ol' Sox
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To: KJC1

I am so very sorry for your losses, KJC. I think that loss is so darn difficult because we have to redefine our life without the person being in it. For example, when I lost my Dad.. I became “fatherless”. When I lost my mom.. I became an “orphan”. (and so on). The only way to go forward is to live a good life.. one they would be proud of. Have faith... because we will see them again.. and the celebration it will be! I push the “bad” memories away (especially the ones in the last months/days of their lives) and focus on the good ones. A very simple philosophy but it helps me. (((Hugs))) Mom


33 posted on 01/02/2018 5:22:02 AM PST by momtothree
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To: mairdie

Thank you.

Both of them were named Joe.

The first one worked for San Francisco PD for 34 years, and then kept working. He was the kind of guy everyone would want to meet: friendly, helpful, funny. A great husband and father, and friend.

The second one served in Viet Nam and then came back and worked for Oakland PD for 17 years until a thug slammed his head into the pavement, causing him a serious back injury. He was a big 6’3” guy of Polish decent who everybody, except thugs, loved. Father of 2 beautiful daughters. He also had a way with words that made everyone laugh.

Thank you, Mairdie, for asking about who they were. They were so much more than I just offered. They were the good guys and they were my best friends.


34 posted on 01/02/2018 5:33:42 AM PST by KJC1 (Illegals: One hand out and the other one flipping us the bird)
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I’m sorry to hear of all the loss of loved ones. I lost my elderly mom before Christmas and it is difficult to face. However I realize she is not uncomfortable and suffering now; this gives a lot of comfort. Prayers for strength are extended to all the surviving family and friends. GOD bless.


35 posted on 01/02/2018 5:39:30 AM PST by TnTnTn
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To: KJC1

Thank you.


36 posted on 01/02/2018 5:40:07 AM PST by Rockingham
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To: momtothree
Have faith... because we will see them again.. and the celebration it will be!

Thank you, this is what I believe too, but dangit, it's hard when they get there first. I know my friends are up there, but can't help missing them here.

37 posted on 01/02/2018 5:40:42 AM PST by KJC1 (Illegals: One hand out and the other one flipping us the bird)
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To: KJC1

Then you do whatever you liked to do before they “went around the corner”. That is how I’ve always seen it.. not gone.. just around the corner. If you liked to fish together (for example), then go fishing. If you liked to barbecue...continue to do so. That way, you will have a lot to talk about when you meet up again. I’ve always felt that they left a little of themselves within us.. and they took a little of us when they went. Yes... very difficult but with time... comes more of an acceptance. Not a total one but more of one. They must have been great people... you mourning their loss so much speaks volumes of who they were. :)


38 posted on 01/02/2018 5:51:07 AM PST by momtothree
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To: momtothree

Thank you for your post; it was very touching. I’m not a crier, but I have some tears streaming. They will be with me always.


39 posted on 01/02/2018 5:58:19 AM PST by KJC1 (Illegals: One hand out and the other one flipping us the bird)
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To: KJC1
Death is a part of life and life is for the living....sounds trite but experience says it is so.

We get older and start losing those around us by attrition and sometimes to violence/accidents/disease and such. We lost both sets of parents after we were married , I lost a sister and the wife lost a nephew and our son is in the final stages of succumbing to a 3 year battle with cancer. Friends we have grown accustomed to have died or developed maladies that make enjoyment of life tough.

What gets us through is knowing that they live in our memories as long as we are here and that they have left the travails of human existence and have achieved the ultimate goal of being with their Lord and Savior - they rejoice while we remain and feel the hole their departure left in our lives.

Life remains good and it goads us to try to enjoy life and each other as we don't know how much time we have left to make something better of our temporary existence on Earth.

Prayers up for you and others and that all find a way to take a firmer hold of the life that is left before we follow those we lost and become the cause of others' sense of loss....

40 posted on 01/02/2018 6:03:45 AM PST by trebb (Where in the the hell has my country gone? I think Trump may give it back...)
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