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If you haven’t seen it, be sure to check out the hilarious user reviews (160) on Amazon for the 5 pound bag of sugar yfree Gummi Bears.

https://www.amazon.com/Haribo-Gummy-Candy-Sugarless-5-Pound/dp/B000EVQWKC

Examples:

“After reading all the other reviews, I would think you might die. In your bathroom. Alone. Out of Charmin toilet paper. Sad. A real Ernest Hemingway ending.”

“This is actually affordable for a complete bowel cleanse before a colonoscopy. Simply don’t eat the red ones. GI specialists frown upon red dye before the test.”

“The enormous increase in popularity of these little guys due to their ability to unleash the beasts of Satan on your bowels have made the seller increase price either A, because he knows he can and people will buy them or B, to purchase insurance for when someone sues him for killing one of their pets or loved ones...”

“The original gummy bears originated 1920 in Bonn, Germany... Was the sugar-free formula developed by Nazi scientists?”

Question: “Has anyone weighed them self before and after to see if they lost any weight? If so, how much did you lose?”

Answer: “1lb water, 7lbs of sanity, 4lbs of hope for humanity, and 9lb 8oz intestinal demon baby.”

Question: “Will I be facing criminal action for adding two 5lb bags to a vat of the spiciest chili known to man for a chili cook off?”

Answer: “The Department of Homeland Security, FBI, CIA, CDC, and FEMA are probably already on their way. MI-6 and the KGB are standing by.”