I was Navy but a good friend of mine was a Marine. I reminded him once that the Marines were a department of the Navy. His reply was quick, he said yes, the men’s department.
Just in case those Marines end up at sea, there are 34 of these oldies but goodies at goatlocker dot org... some don’t apply anymore but they are still funny.
Ways to Simulate Navy Life at Home
1. Lock all friends and family outside. Your only means of communication should be with letters that your neighbors have held for at least three weeks, discarding two of five.
2. Surround yourself with 200 people that you don’t really know or like: people who smoke, snore like Mack trucks going uphill, and use foul language like a child uses sugar on cereal.
3. Unplug all radios and TVs to completely cut yourself off from the outside world. Have a neighbor bring you a Time, Newsweek, or Proceedings from five years ago to keep you abreast of current events.
4. Monitor all home appliances hourly, recording all vital information (ie: plugged in, lights come on when doors open, etc.)
5. Do not flush the toilet for five days to simulate the smell of 40 people using the same commode.
6. Lock the bathroom twice a day for a four-hour period.
Wear only military uniforms. Even though nobody cares, clean and press one dress uniform and wear it for 20 minutes.
7. Cut your hair weekly, making it shorter each time, until you look bald or look like you lost a fight with a demented sheep.
8. Work in 19-hour cycles, sleeping only four hours at a time, to ensure that your body does not know or even care if it is day or night.
what does the Marine Corps call the navy? Transportation