OK. You’re in line right behind this sweet lady named Debbie. I can’t exactly remember her last name, “Washerwoman-Schultz” or something.
Anyway, as soon as she’s finished making her deposit...
Here’s the email I got.
Dear ArGee,
As you know, the Democratic National Committee is all about helping the little guy in every way we can. We think we’ve found a new way to help you.
Many of our donors offer their estates in the event of their death. One such donor unfortunately died intestate and with no next of kin. Since you have the same last name we want to present you as the next of kin. All you have to do is agree that our donor agreed to live his entire estate to the DNC and we will give you 10%. As the estate was over $1 billion your portion will be a significant.
All we need is your bank account number and your agreement to appear if the court should request it. We’ll take care of the rest of the details.
Sincerely,
Debbie Wasserman Schultz
DNC Chairwoman