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Guy Fieri Impersonator Robs Sports Bar
Jezebel Blog Kitchenette ^ | 10/07/15 7:17p | C.A. Pinkham

Posted on 11/09/2015 2:04:56 PM PST by Cowman

You get one guess which state brings us this story, after which I will hit you with a giant stick on which are whittled the words “IT’S ALWAYS FLORIDA.”

It’s not clear whether this guy was a deliberate Guy Fieri impersonator or just an accidental one, but either way, look at that picture and try to tell me that doesn’t look eerily like the Donkey Saucing Mayor of Flavortown. Via WFLA, the Fieri-esque thief apparently stole food and several bottles of alcohol from Ferg’s Sports Bar in St. Petersburg, Florida after breaking into a rear entrance past closing time.

Police are now asking for help identifying the burglar, so if you live in St. Petersburg, a) I’m so sorry, and b) think back on if you thought you spotted Guy Fieri at any local hot spots recently. We won’t know for sure why the guy appears to have modeled his entire look after the host of Diners, Drive-ins, and Dives until if and when the police manage to catch him. Part of me wants answers, but another part very badly doesn’t want the reality to let down the fantasy I’ve constructed in my head.

Regardless, man, it feels good to get to type “Guy Fieri” again—and to get to use that tag.


TOPICS: Chit/Chat
KEYWORDS: dives; guyfieri; robbery
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To: BlessedBeGod

” That show’s on so often on the Food Network, I’ve started calling it The Guy Fieri Network”

Let lone the “Guy Ferry Network” His given last name, no idea why the family changed it.


21 posted on 11/09/2015 2:53:32 PM PST by DAC21 (.z)
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To: Cowman

I watched ‘The Next Food Network Star’ when Guy Fieri was a contestant.

My opinion is that he should have been cut several times, as such I have never watched a single episode of any of his shows.

I guess he ticks the NASCAR profile and finds eateries I would never set foot in. To each his own...

I for one, find his looks absolutely offensive. I pity his children though I sincerely do not begrudge him his well earned success.


22 posted on 11/09/2015 3:01:18 PM PST by BBB333 (Q: Which is grammatically correct? Joe Biden IS or Joe Biden ARE an idiot?)
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To: Cowman
I hate the cooking channel. The wife watches it all the time. Thank goodness for multiple TVs


23 posted on 11/09/2015 3:14:08 PM PST by Vaquero ( Don't pick a fight with an old guy. If he is too old to fight, he'll just kill you.)
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To: Cowman

24 posted on 11/09/2015 3:17:59 PM PST by Slyfox (Will no one rid us of this meddlesome president?)
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
I liked his show. Too bad he’s started a life of crime.

Do some research on his crappy line of kitchenware.


25 posted on 11/09/2015 3:38:58 PM PST by 867V309 (Trump: Bull in a RINO Shoppe)
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To: Larry Lucido; Gamecock; PROCON; KC_Lion
[He’ll fry for this.]

Or, more likely, sauté.

Technically, you're sautéed.
26 posted on 11/09/2015 4:14:24 PM PST by SaveFerris (Be a blessing to a stranger today for some have entertained angels unaware)
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To: Slyfox

Sorry sly that guy doesn’t look Gay enough


27 posted on 11/09/2015 8:11:18 PM PST by TexasTransplant (Idiocracy used to just be a Movie... Live every day as your last...one day you will be right)
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