Curly: Hey Moe, you know what I think?’’
Moe:
“Every time you think you weaken the nation’’.
Moe as a census taker: “Pardon me sir, US Census here. First question, Are you married or happy?’’
(From “ Dizzy Pilots” [1945)
(The Stooges are building a plane)
Moe: Where’s your vise?
Curly: Vice? I have no vice, I’m as pure as the driven snow!
Moe: But you drifted.
(Moe hits Curly in the forehead)
________________________________________
(From Pardon My Scotch[1935)
(The Stooges are installing a door, the owner told them to put the door ‘on the right’)
Moe: Now let’s see.. the door goes on the right (looks at his right hand and nods) Right.
Curly: (In front of Moe) Wait a minute...the man said the door goes on the right! (points to opposite direction)
Moe: (Showing Curly his right hand as a fist) What’s this?
Curly: A fist
Moe:(Moe hits Curly in the forehead) Right or left?
(Curly meditates on this)
Moe: Oh, ignorant ehh?
(He hits him again)
Moe: Now, listen grapehead, I’ll explain this so even you can understand it
(They change positions)
Moe: Now when I say go, we both point to the right...go!
(They point in opposite directions; Curly recoils)
Moe: (to Larry) Hey porcupine come here!
(Larry approaches, he is facing Moe’s right side and Curly’s left)
Moe: Point to the right for this chump will ya?
(Larry point to a completely different direction than the other two)
Curly’: See?
Moe: (slapping both; grumpy voice) Stop playing, get to work...Where’s the map?...Over there (it’s on the right of the audience)
Curly ordering breakfast,"I'll have a rotten egg and some burnt toast!"
Moe with a double take, "what are you ordering that for?"
Curly, "I got a tape worm, that's good enough for him!"
And,
Curley, "I try to think but nothing happens!"