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Intestinal gas could be used to diagnose diseases
medicalxpress.com ^ | 03-12-2015 | Staff & Provided by Cell Press

Posted on 03/12/2015 10:26:02 AM PDT by Red Badger

click here to read article


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1 posted on 03/12/2015 10:26:02 AM PDT by Red Badger
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To: Red Badger

WOW! What a gas.


2 posted on 03/12/2015 10:28:27 AM PDT by AEMILIUS PAULUS
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To: Red Badger

If this means I don’t have to undergo a colonoscopy, then I’m investing in this company.


3 posted on 03/12/2015 10:28:56 AM PDT by P-Marlowe (Saying that ISIL is not Islamic is like saying Obama is not an Idiot.)
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To: Red Badger

“Bad news, Mr. Drill - you appear to be suffering from Hoof and Mouth Disease.”


4 posted on 03/12/2015 10:29:43 AM PDT by Billthedrill
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To: Red Badger

This story doesn’t pass the smell test.


5 posted on 03/12/2015 10:32:04 AM PDT by PGR88
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To: Red Badger

Just a dollop of fermented cabbage (quite easily made) every couple of days works wonders from our experience.


6 posted on 03/12/2015 10:35:34 AM PDT by gorush (History repeats itself because human nature is static)
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To: Red Badger

why the stool sample? just fart into it.


7 posted on 03/12/2015 10:35:40 AM PDT by HiTech RedNeck (Embrace the Lion of Judah and He will roar for you and teach you to roar too. See my page.)
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To: P-Marlowe

Years ago the firm I worked for changed their health insurance provider forcing us to choose new doctors in a different clinic system. My wife was looking through the bios of the Doctors within the system and asked me who I wanted...I told her to look for the Doctor with the smallest fingers.


8 posted on 03/12/2015 10:39:23 AM PDT by gorush (History repeats itself because human nature is static)
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To: HiTech RedNeck

If your poop floats...its got a lot of gas in it. If it sinks...not so much.


9 posted on 03/12/2015 10:40:01 AM PDT by Sacajaweau
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To: Red Badger

Ben Franklin would be proud.


10 posted on 03/12/2015 10:40:45 AM PDT by Texicanus (Texas, it's like a whole 'nother country.)
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To: gorush

KIMCHI!.................

http://norecipes.com/recipe/kimchi/


11 posted on 03/12/2015 10:41:55 AM PDT by Red Badger (Man builds a ship in a bottle. God builds a universe in the palm of His hand.............)
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To: Red Badger

Aw crap. I thought it was going to be more of an amplitude and volume sensing device. Add in a piezo-electric sparking unit and you’ve got a frat party!


12 posted on 03/12/2015 10:44:34 AM PDT by Bloody Sam Roberts (Where am I to go now that I've gone too far?)
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To: Red Badger
My company and I have decided to patent our new "Intestinal Gas Compressor" so that this valuable resource can be used as a motor fuel on long trips. It was developed with a $20 Million Grant from the Obama Administration and the Arkansas Industrial Development Authority.

It is unobtrusively built-in to the driver's seat. I would love to have your endorsement because you are an authority figure in the automotive world. We will be at your home to custom fit the device to your automobiles. Give it a try and take notes on mileage, etc. Usual fees and expenses will apply, of course.

So far, most of the orders are coming in from rural Scotland, where many of the male drivers wear the kilt,which does facilitate installment.

13 posted on 03/12/2015 10:46:14 AM PDT by Kenny Bunk (Obama kept his promises. Has your Republican Congressman done the same?)
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To: Billthedrill

That’s just great.

Now when I have to go the Dz
MV emissions testing station.
, they will put a vacuum hose up my butt and make me run the damn rollers.

“Mr. C your 1986 Jeep passed the tests, but you seem to have a problem with your personal methane emissions. Your tests results will be forwarded to the EPA and your Obamacare provider. Good luck with that. Snort”


14 posted on 03/12/2015 10:47:18 AM PDT by Covenantor ("Men are ruled...by liars who refuse them news, and by fools who cannot govern." Chesterton)
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To: Sacajaweau

Floaters and sinkers has more to do with the lipid content than trapped gas. The gas is what assists the pushing. A little authentic kimshi will stoke the pressure tank quite well.


15 posted on 03/12/2015 10:50:10 AM PDT by RJS1950 (The democrats are the "enemies foreign and domestic" cited in the federal oath)
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To: Red Badger; tx_eggman


"Man, when we were little, if we wanted a jacuzzi we had to fart in the tub"

Now, if you want a medical diagnosis, you have to fart in the tube.
16 posted on 03/12/2015 10:54:32 AM PDT by SpinnerWebb (IN-SAPORIBVS-SICVT-PVLLVM)
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To: Red Badger

hmmmm.....perhaps you should have mentioned attending your nephew’s birthday party at Taco Bell before we decided to remove your colon.


17 posted on 03/12/2015 10:58:35 AM PDT by Buckeye McFrog
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To: Buckeye McFrog

Have you ever had a colonoscopy?.................


18 posted on 03/12/2015 11:01:57 AM PDT by Red Badger (Man builds a ship in a bottle. God builds a universe in the palm of His hand.............)
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To: Red Badger
a real-time in vitro fecal fermentation gas-sensing system

I gotta get me one of those.

19 posted on 03/12/2015 11:06:34 AM PDT by ConservingFreedom (A goverrnment strong enough to impose your standards is strong enough to ban them.)
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To: gorush
"Doctor...smallest fingers"

The last time a doctor performed the procedure on me, I related to him how painful the first time it was done on me by another doctor. This doctor said the first time he had it done, the doctor who performed it was a big guy with huge hands. You can imagine the result.

Moral of story: always have it done by docs with small hands.

20 posted on 03/12/2015 12:53:22 PM PDT by driftless2 (For long term happiness, learn how to play the accordion.)
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