[Focault's Pendulum]

I actually compiled a list of installer excuses on the company computer when I was managing a floor covering operation.

Some of the ones I recall

These are all actual excuses personally told to me.

I was in jail.
My helper was in jail
I had to bail out my helper
My van got repossessed.
There's a boot on one of the wheels of my van (parked in someone else's driveway)
I forgot where I parked my van last night.
Someone broke into my van last night and stole my steering wheel. I had to steer with a pair of vise grips.

And my all time favorite:

Carpet installer explaining why he was five hours late in picking up the goods.

Someone snuck into my bedroom last night and took the batteries out of my alarm clock.

[MrB]

Jake: No, I didn’t. Honest... I ran out of gas. I... I had a flat tire. I didn’t have enough money for cab fare. My tux didn’t come back from the cleaners. An old friend came in from out of town. Someone stole my car. There was an earthquake. A terrible flood. Locusts! IT WASN’T MY FAULT, I SWEAR TO GOD!