"It started out as a boil on my arse"
Posted on 07/02/2013 8:45:56 AM PDT by Allah AtBar
I attended a screener of the Lone Ranger movie last night, the director Gore Verbinski dropped by and introduced the opening of the film. In summary (and without spoilers): The Lone Ranger character starts out as weak and naive and ends the movie as a weak and naive but now following Tonto. I struggle to remember if any of the white male characters were portrayed as anything other than evil, racist, greedy, inept, or religious zealots. Even the military is not spared; the cavalry captain is portrayed as Hollywood’s stereotypical ”General Custer” type replete with Van Dyke beard and long hair. Other irritations: The band is knocked off the stage while playing the Star Spangled Banner, only the villains speak of love for god and country, only the evil characters use guns to kill people and even Gettysburg is mentioned but only as a rational of why the bad guy is bad. This is not a movie to see during the week of July 4th.
*** became a “leather nun” in San Francisco, and generally went completely nuts.***
NO! NO! Not Debbie Reynolds!
I shall take a pass on this one. Yechhh.
I can remember the origin of the lone ranger story on saturday afternoon tv when I was a sprout (in the late 1950s).
I despise Disney with all my artistic heart exactly because they CONSTANTLY trash stories JUST like this one is being trashed.
Hey Disney studios” ESAD!
Sure, plenty of people have fond memories or it, but they're really not that good compared to some of the other western series of the time ("Have Gun Will Travel" or Sam Peckinpah's "The Westerner" to name two). The fact that any studio executive thought there was some brand equity in that property for it's intended audience of 15-30 year olds is just amazingly laughable.
It’s a shame Ansara never became a bigger star. He always had a very commanding presence. If Ricardo Montalban had never played Khan (excluding that British nancy-boy in that farce of a remake), Ansara would’ve been excellent.
He was great as Kang in TOS, stole that episode.
Actually Sister Sourire filed a lawsuit against Sally Field and the production company that did The Flying Nun. It was pretty much laughed out of court.
Allegedly her great American tour went rotten as soon as she touched down in San Francisco. Alcohol, drugs, hedonistic sex, you name it. Several tour dates were canceled because she was unconscious. But the climax came at Notre Dame.
She was going to give a huge concert there, but first gave a command performance in front of luminaries including Robert F. Kennedy. It was a disaster. She started singing her song, then got increasingly shrill and finally stood up and started slinging profanities at Kennedy before “excommunicating” him. That was pretty much the end of her tour. She was sent back to Belgium.
However, she then made several scandals at her convent, and out of sheer luck was invited to meet the Pope. He showed little interest in her idea of creating a new order of singing nuns, with her as the Mother Superior General, and ended up cursing him to his face.
Pretty much the end of her holy orders. So, back to the US. Things just got uglier and uglier.
This is a movie to skip.
John Carter had bad PR but was a good movie.
Lone ranger is a BAD movie with Dep centric PR to sell popcorn? This sounds like Politicall Correct Lone Ranger. NO THANKS!
after it opens people can go to http://www.themoviespoiler.com and just read a complete plot synopsis and SAVE YOUR MONEY.
Who knows?
I wouldn’t wish to see it in any case.
the effetes and communists could never do justice to a true lone ranger movie.
Drunk Clown Pirate Depp is a one trick pony. Mad hatter, capt jack sparrow, this, and all the others are the same character with just makeup.
Lou Lumenick of the New York Post calls it "the worst western - and then some... [a] bloated, misshapen mess, a stillborn franchise loaded with metaphors for its feeble attempts to amuse, excite and entertain."
Richard Roeper of the Chicago Sun-Times says, "This is slick trash. A bloated, unfunny, sometimes downright bizarre train wreck featuring some of the loudest, longest and least entertaining actual train wrecks in recent memory."
Mick LaSalle of the San Francisco Chronicle writes, "But put aside the notion that children shouldn't see this film. No one should. "The Lone Ranger" is a movie for the whole family ... to avoid. It represents 2 1/2 of the longest hours on record, a jumbled botch that is so confused in its purpose and so charmless in its effect that it must be seen to be believed, but better yet, no. Don't see it, don't believe it, not unless a case of restless leg syndrome sounds like a fun time at the movies."
More reviews here.
All in all it sounds quite awful. What you could say in mitigation is that it may be more about Johnny Depp than about actual Indians -- one of those he is an Indian, but he isn't really an Indian things, sort of a "Pirates of the Desert" thing.
The whole political correctness goes awry when Indians get butchered while the leads yuk it up, and could get the filmmakers in hot water. Also, it sounds like they could be playing off Depp's 1995 off-beat Jim Jarmusch western Dead Man a little, which was also chaotic and rambling.
You forgot Edward Sissorhands.
"It started out as a boil on my arse"
Clayton Moore, and Jay Silverheels the ONLY Lone Ranger and Tonto...at least for me.
The Lone Ranger was probably a Zorro rip off to begin with. :)
There were some good white males in the movie. They got killed by the bad ones.... and the Lone Ranger and Tonto set it right.
For those who haven't seen it... if you're looking for a remake of what we watched as kids.... this ain't it. But we're not kids anymore either. Nothing is going to roll back the hands of time for any of us.
So how's this whole 21st century thing working out for you? LOL!
I thought it was great as well. It was like a western “Pirates of the Caribbean”, which is exactly what I thought it would be. I could have lived without the William Tell overture. Too corny, especially as played over the action scenes. Should have gotten a new score, like “Man of Steel” did. Otherwise, it was fun.
it works just fine till you start screwing with my childhood.
How’s the Obama Admin working for you?
I remember the TV show from when I was a kid. Jay Silverheels was a friend to children and a character to look up to. He was never an Uncle Tom. He was the first positive image of Native Americans for me. The other was Ed Ames on Daniel Boone, as Daniel’s Indian friend - a show currently shown on ME-TV.
This film was a silly idea to begin with — does anyone over fifty know who The Lone Ranger is? Not surprised that it is bombing. What next? The Bowery Boys?
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