Advice about depression, please

myself | May 29 2013 | myself

[proud American in Canada]

Hi Freepers,

I have a question for you. It is late, so if anyone answers me, I’ll probably have to answer most posts tomorrow. I have this weird dichotomy going on. I go to church and pray a lot—but there is a part of me that just wants to die, although I don’t really want to. I was just listening to the Stone Temple Pilots—“I Got You”—about heroin. For a few moments I thought about how I might procure some, because tomorrow I have to go to the American Embassy in Ottawa to fix my papers so I can go see my family in Chicago; the embassy is near the Byward Market, where there are many drug dealers. Why is it that a person could be so divided. I feel so sad, and yet, so full of faith. Anyway… take care, Julie

[Razz Barry]

I can understand how you feel. Some days I've wished I could go to sleep and not wake-up. Years ago I thought of killing myself, but, thank G-d, I thought of what it would do to those who care about me. Sometimes I forget that I am loved. I've seen what suicide does to those left behind. It's horrible.
I'm not taking anything for depression, nor have I talked to doctors about it. I think most drugs just make things worse, however, I have taken St. Johns Wort and it does help. I've never told my doctor of my depression because I didn't want to be on a list.
After learning of SAD, I force myself to get outside for a couple of hours a day. Getting outside doing gardening, and taking my dog for a walk helps me a lot. I know this seems stupid, I thought it when I first read it myself, but, just telling myself “I'm happy” and smiling helps. At least it helps me.
Also, thinking of ways to piss off liberals makes life worth living. For years thinking about how bad the world was made me depressed. Now I think about how good it will be to see Obama and Holder in handcuffs and on their way to jail.

[PastorBooks]

Dear Julie,

Please let me say something from the heart. I feel where you are coming from, but not from depression. Today I went with my mother to the hospital where she was diagnosed with heart failure. The doctor thinks we caught it in time, but then he said something that shocked us. There was a tumor we didn’t even know was there!

We are overwhelmed with this, it is so much to take in. What is more we don’t have what we need to fight this, nor even the ability to get into the nearest large hospital so we can have the tests my mother needs.

I am exhausted, my legs are in much pain from standing all day, and I am just sitting here trying to get my mind off it long enough to drink some juice and go to bed. I am so tired.

And I see your post.

Julie, I want you to understand this is coming from someone who is living in a hell right now. My mother is suffering, I am suffering. We are at the end of our strength.

But give up? Never! We will pray, we will ask for prayer, whatever. We will fight this. I will never give up. My mother will not give up.

Julie, I have had so much pain in the last 6-7 years. I am hurting so badly. I need a miracle. I know what bad times can do to you. And with everything in me, I just want to plead with you: Hang in there!

You say you pray. Our God hears prayer, even when we can’t hear Him. Right now I can’t hear Him. I wondered today why the Lord was being so silent. I can’t hear Him. But that doesn’t stop me from knowing He is there. That He loves us. That He is working things out.

Julie, don’t numb the pain. Please don’t. That is a road that will take you deeper and deeper into real despair. Let God into your pain. Share it with Him. He loves you. He is listening. Just talk to Him.

I want to recommend something to you. There is a Bible teacher who impacted my life years ago, and I think you need to hear what he has to say. His name is Malcolm Smith. His understanding of God’s love is... unbelievable. I think his youtube videos may change your life.

http://www.youtube.com/user/MalcolmSmithWebinars/
http://www.malcolmsmith.org/

Julie, I’m going to pray for you, that the Lord will show Himself to you and tell you how much He loves you.

Please pray for me and my mother, too.

Yours,

PastorBooks

[presently no screen name]

Realize that maybe listening to Stone Temple Pilots is not what you need to be doing

Good advice and warning. It opened the door to something that is not good - it invited in something that is destructive.

[Eagles6]

Have you had drug issues before?

Do you have a priest or clergy that you can call?

As a last resort go to the ER or call for emergency services.

Please think of how this would affect your family.

We will pray for you here.

[ansel12]

You accidently posted that to me, instead of the thread poster ‘proud American in Canada’.

[married21]

In the meantime, make sure you are well-rested. Also, music that makes you want to get up and dance can be really mood lifting.

[wardaddy]

Lol....late...in bed on droid..tks

[zeestephen]

Thinking about Marco Rubio and Chris Christie makes me want to die, too.

[thecodont]

Wonderful advice!

God bless you.

[Mogger]

Rule #1 I've always had for myself. NO drugs. It's a quite simple rule, just do it.

A good thing to watch (or read, if you can find the book), is One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich.

When you see the misery guys went through in the Soviet Gulag, whatever little problems we have in our lives pale into insignificance.

Here is a link to the whole movie on youtube, you can find it on youtube in 10 parts too.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tdkvpopu0kY

[Rad_J]

Vitamin D is a must for me. It took several doctor visits and tests to find I was low on vitamin D3. Without it I start to lose hope and I want to swallow a gun. It’s makes no sense but i am lucky to have such a simple and cheap solution that is available at any grocery store.

I had never had any problem with any sort of depression so it took some time for me to be able to get help because I just tried to ignore it and cover it up. Keep reaching out and you will find the help you need.

[utahagen]

You should not go to Ottawa alone. Tell a friend you are tempted to buy drugs when you go get your paperwork and ask that friend to accompany you to keep you from buying heroin. If you don’t have a friend you can trust, go to a church and explain that you need to get your paperwork, but can’t risk doing so alone. If you can’t get a friend or volunteer to go with you, pay someone to go with you. Just get your paperwork, do NOT buy drugs, and go to visit your family in Chicago ASAP. Once you are with family, you can work on the next steps to battling depression.

[Gene Eric]

Also heard that vitamin D can help improve the zest for life. The weather has been lousy, and we’re not getting the Spring boost we normally expect.

>> Depression.

Might be nutrition, hormonal, lack of exercise, lack of sunlight. Avoid street narcotics. Avoid alcohol — it’s a depressant. Get a physical checkup by a doctor. Describe your symptoms. Take steps in the “right” direction :)

You’re not alone, by the way. These are indeed depressing times, but that’s gonna change.

I hit a rough spot not long ago. The only way to get sleep was through prayer. And though I hate going to sleep, the prayer became so effective, I looked forward to going to bed just to pray. I simply asked Jesus for love and peace of mind. I didn’t much dwell on the details of the things that were contributing to my misery. I just wanted to live my life without the distractions of despair. Life is so much easier that way.

You have our love and support!

[Cold Heat]

Just to talk to your doctor...I don’t know much about Canadian medicine. But you may need a little medical intervention to get you through a crisis or perhaps you need something more.

I had this issue once, I nearly waited too long but when I finally admitted it they managed to get me through the bottom of it and I popped back up the following year.

Stuff happens to you, sometimes it’s way more than you can carry on a day to day basis and I hope you can get the right help, get through it or find the help you need for whatever time you need it. But you have to ask for it.

[5th MEB]

You sound like a reasonably intelligent person so I will tell you straight out, killing your self is the STUPIDEST, MOST SELFISH, COWARDLY THING YOU WILL EVER DO!!!
Point #1: Killing your self does not solve any problems; it just makes you DEAD! The rest of your FAMILY and your FRIENDS still have to live and cope with your cowardly escape from life.
POINT #2: Every body experiences depression and occasionally even entertains thoughts of suicide; even I have had these thoughts in my younger days, IT WAS STUPID AND COWARDLY THEN JUST AS IT WOULD BE NOW!!
POINT #3: GLAD I DIDN'T DO IT. My time came in the military hospital at Kobe, Japan in 1971; just after I had lost many FRIENDS at Khe Sahn and could not understand why I had to go on living when they all died. I felt like the whole world was out to get me because I should have died with those men who were closer to me than my own family.
Fortunately for me; a Jewish Chaplin, (I am Catholic, the Catholic Chaplin did not have time for me) told me a story about a group of people who had been tortured, persecuted and even murdered by the millions through out history, but refused to surrender, refused to be murdered and refused to be exterminated and excised from the human race.
I only talked to that man for maybe 10 or 15 minutes and I still remember his name and the lesson he taught me. His name was Captain Victor M. Solomon; he taught me never to surrender and never give up hope because tomorrow is a new day. That was 42 pretty good years ago.
Since that day I have had to fight the world for every thing I have earned ; there were good days and bad days, good years and bad years; but at least I had the years, days, and minutes to make of them what I will.
I married and raised two pretty good kids, (one boy, one girl)and got to watch them both graduate from college.
Been married to the same great woman for the last 39 years and have loved every second of it.
All of these things I would have lost if I had decided to off myself way back then.
A short list of the things I would not have ever had the opportunity to enjoy if I had not been around.

1: Finding my wife and marrying her.
2: Getting to see both of my children being born.
3: The good friends I have met and made.
4: Watching my children grow into being a fine young Man and Woman.
5: Giving my daughter away at her wedding (got to torture her boyfriend pretty good first time I met him, fathers prerogative).
6: All the great hunting trips with my friends and son (my daughter said she hated the bugs and dirt).
7: All the good cold beers after work or play.
8: All the good conversations with family and friends.
9: All the good dogs I have been privileged to have in my family.
10: All the things I have been privileged to do to encourage young employees to improve their skills and prospects. MY FRIEND; that was JUST THE SHORT LIST; the list could go on from about 2:00 pm on June 23rd 1971 but it would take 42 years to write it. Your depression seems insurmountable to you right now, I know the feeling because I have been there. Trust me kid, YOU can beat this and YOU WILL! Just keep telling yourself that no matter what the world tries to throw at you, TOMORROW YOU WILL GO OUT THERE AND KICK ASS AND TAKE NAMES. Your survival is at stake and YOU WILL NOT BE DEFEATED!! YOU WILL NOT SURRENDER!!! You have my prayers and a direct order from Ssgt 5th MEB circa 1971; "YOU WILL NOT GO MEEKLY INTO THE GAS CHAMBERS". You will beat this thing and come out stronger on the other side, and be a better person for having gone through it.

[Amberdawn]

Julie, I’ve found that it’s the depression talking when one feels likely to harm oneself. It doesn’t have to be suicide, either, taking heroin will not solve a thing, only put you in a deeper hole. Think positive, get enough sleep, talk to people-Being isolated makes you feel as if you’re the only one with these problems. Feel free to write to me anytime to chat! God Bless!

[Eurotwit]

I am bumping that.

d3 is a major issue now in the west, and one of the main symtomps of defiency is depression.

Look at Norway, my country, people commit suicuide when there is no sun in the arctic.

Best source of d3? The sun. Might be a problem for a lot of us, depending on age and climate. Most of us are not working out in the fields anymore.

So go to a tanning studio a couple of times during winter, and/or get d3 supplements/fishoil.

[Berlin_Freeper]

There are a great many reasons to keep on living.