I was certain this was written by Meghan McCain at first, and am still not certain she’s hasn’t adopted a pen name just to avoid associating the McCain dynasty with those tacky gun nuts.
It’s the same pop-culture driven, self-absorbed twaddle directed at individuals she couldn’t possibly understand, but deigns to make a derisive attempt in order to hopefully place herself above those she “counsels.”
Once the children are raised, there is no good reason for the man and woman to stay together unless it is their choice to do so. That's why I believe that marriages should last until the children are raised. Once they are raised, the main reason for them getting together is gone and they should be free to "move about the country" like they say in the commercial. Of course, they have the option to renew their vows and grow old together if they like - and there is nothing wrong with that whatsoever. Remember that for most of human civilization, the average adult only lived until his/her offspring was ready to take over as heads of the family. As soon as they became a burden to the family unit, the older people would quickly be left by the side of the road to die. I mean, what else could be done? It wasn't like they had an Happy Acres Retirement Community back in ancient days, where nurses would empty your bedpan and bingo would get played on Tuesday nights.
But I suppose I digress.
Getting back to the point, I don't think the main problem with young men these days is that they are "pansies" or otherwise effeminate. True, some men are fairies, always have been, just like some women are dykes and are as mean as bulls.
I think it's more of a "mama's boy" syndrome going on here with the young men of today. This is the age after all of the "helicopter parent" who insist on structuring every moment of their offspring's day, filling them up with absurd organized activities such as soccer and karate. Karate? Has anybody ever heard of a picked-on kid win a fistfight because his mother sent him to karate?
But I digress...again.
All this helicopter parenting has helped to create a generation of young males who simply do not have the confidence to strike out on their own. As a result, they end up spending their 20s and even 30s in the basement of their parents homes, playing videogames and bouncing from dead-end job to dead-end job (no pressure to pay the rent or purchase business suits).
Now there was Little League around when I was a kid but in those days, parents didn't drive their kids to practices in mini-vans and sit in lawn chairs shouting encouragement everytime a pop fly was shagged or a ground ball fielded. I don't think I had a parent attend a single practice and only rarely would they even attend an actual game. Back then, we would walk the 10 blocks or so to the practice field on our own and walk back in the growing darkness after it was over. If I had ice cream at all, I bought it myself with my newspaper route money.
Anyway, all I'm saying here is that men need to establish independence (away from mommy and daddy) and have their own pad and drive a decent set of wheels that they themselves purchased. They also need to know when a sports jacket and slacks is more appropriate then sneakers and jeans. They also need to lose the ball caps. Ball caps are for Little Leaguers and old men with time on their hands (or when you are out fishing). And when you are dating women, don't talk about sports. Most women don't give a crap about sports.
So having effeminate qualities really has nothing to do with it. After all, many women are "tomboys" and that can be endearing. There's nothing wrong with a woman who can properly hit a fastball or kick a man's butt in tennis, so long as they know how to look good in a dress and heels and otherwise retain their feminine qualities.
So if men want to show some feminine traits, it can actually be perceived by women as signs of confidence in one's masculinity, especially when those men back it up by being a man where it counts - absolute financial and emotional independence. The real "pansies" are the men who are insecure about their masculinity so they overcompensate by acting like obnoxious jerks all the time and dress and act like they are still jockeying for social position in the high school hallways.
I can’t disagree with what she has said, but she left out some crucial attributes: intelligence, character, a sense of humour and kindness.
