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How to survive the sequester (it will be worse than Y2K and Climate change both put together)
SOL of course | 2/18/13 | SOL

Posted on 02/28/2013 7:56:18 PM PST by sickoflibs

This really has me terrified. I don't know it our country will survive this. We have about 1 hour before sequester hits the East Coast and most Americans are mostly unaware of it.

We cant fault our President Obama.
He has been traveling around the country speaking in political rallies warning us of the worst if it hits, but they just wont listen. They wont listen!

Only an emergency tax increase bill could save us now and the GOP just wont do it. They don't care. They don't care.

The only thing comparable is how Noah warned of the coming flood and was ignored and most of the human race drowned.
I am worried about the vampires coming out after the military and police are furloughed. And all the mass killers let loose after the power goes off in the prisons and the guards are furloughed.

So what can we do now??

1) Store Bottled water and dry food
2) candles matches and firewood
3) Guns, but please do it safely and wait for the universal background check or you might use it to commit suicide
4) Go in your basement if you have one and hide under a strong table
5) garlic to hold off the vampires
6) A floatation device in case the tidal wave floods your basement.
7) If you have a car with gas flee Maryland, DC and Northern Va right now, as Sequester will hit that area the hardest.

Good luck and good bless, I have loved you all even the ones who cursed me. By the way, why don't you last group stay behind?


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: doomsday; movedthread; obamatheseer; sequester; sequestration; stillalive; thisisbreakingnews; thisisfrontpagenews; wearedoomed
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To: Lancey Howard

How all the water turning to blood, frogs raining down from the skies, and incurable boils on your skin? Oh, and swarms of flesh eating locusts too btw.


61 posted on 02/28/2013 8:45:08 PM PST by RC one (.From My Cold Dead Hands.)
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To: Lancey Howard

How about all the water turning to blood, frogs raining down from the skies, and incurable boils on your skin? Oh, and swarms of flesh eating locusts too btw.


62 posted on 02/28/2013 8:45:28 PM PST by RC one (.From My Cold Dead Hands.)
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To: dalereed

No wonder all you get for Christmas is underwear.:)


63 posted on 02/28/2013 8:45:28 PM PST by berdie
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To: berdie

Female sequestration should be outlawed


64 posted on 02/28/2013 8:47:14 PM PST by GeronL (http://asspos.blogspot.com)
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To: GeronL

Well played, GeronL!


65 posted on 02/28/2013 8:47:14 PM PST by berdie
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To: sickoflibs

scene: Batman and Robin tied to stakes, giant eel-like Sequesters moving toward them.....

NARRATOR:

Is Obama the mad Sequester Requester?

or are the Republicans in on it too?

Tune in next week on the same sequested time and channel


66 posted on 02/28/2013 8:50:46 PM PST by GeronL (http://asspos.blogspot.com)
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To: sickoflibs

67 posted on 02/28/2013 8:54:08 PM PST by mnehring
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To: GeronL; berdie
RE:”Next you are gonna try to tell me there is no Santa Clause
...
That depends on whether it was exempted by a Sequester Clause”

Laugh it up Tea party extremists.

Santa's one day a week furlough means the children's presents could get under their tree late.

You think that's funny? Those poor kids running down stairs Christmas morning to find nothing, till two mornings later?

Grinch!

68 posted on 02/28/2013 8:54:08 PM PST by sickoflibs (Losing to Dems and Obama is not a principle! Its just losing.)
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To: berdie

News alert: “Sequester the No-Lesser must be kept away from your kids piggy banks at all times....”


69 posted on 02/28/2013 8:54:21 PM PST by GeronL (http://asspos.blogspot.com)
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To: berdie

if you consider a $40k 1936 custom Chevy hot rod underware that was my Christmas present last year, so be it!


70 posted on 02/28/2013 8:55:04 PM PST by dalereed
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71 posted on 02/28/2013 8:55:50 PM PST by TheBigB (I voted 4 Obama & all I got was this lousy t-shirt & 15 mins in the back of a Prius with Sandy Fluke)
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72 posted on 02/28/2013 8:56:40 PM PST by mnehring
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To: Vince Ferrer

Stole it!

(because it’s easier to ask forgiveness than for permission)


73 posted on 02/28/2013 9:00:22 PM PST by EDINVA
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74 posted on 02/28/2013 9:00:44 PM PST by mnehring
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To: al baby

Sequester means no ex-lax and everyone will be bloated until their insides explode with BRD!

I have to repost because there is no FReeper named ‘sequester’ (not YET)


75 posted on 02/28/2013 9:01:30 PM PST by GeronL (http://asspos.blogspot.com)
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To: Cowboy Bob

Ping for later amusement


76 posted on 02/28/2013 9:01:30 PM PST by Cowboy Bob (Soon the "invisible hand" will press the economic "reset" button.)
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To: berdie
Ahhh...the Sonata for Banjo and Accordian. My favorite. I danced to it at my wedding.

If I had known then what I know now, I'd be a Sgt Major in the Legion Estranger. Music isn't much different, the settings are a little rougher. But the battles are more fair and you just live or die, without giving a house to a person that hates you.

/johnny

77 posted on 02/28/2013 9:02:00 PM PST by JRandomFreeper (Gone Galt)
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To: sickoflibs

Poor Gabby won’t get that sequestered gown and slippers she wanted!


78 posted on 02/28/2013 9:02:20 PM PST by GeronL (http://asspos.blogspot.com)
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To: sickoflibs

Am I too late? I forgot to get CAT LITTER!!!


79 posted on 02/28/2013 9:03:51 PM PST by goodnesswins (R.I.P. Doherty, Smith, Stevens, Woods.)
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80 posted on 02/28/2013 9:06:34 PM PST by mnehring
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