Skip to comments.
(-:(-:(-:THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS THREAD:-):-):-)
1-11-13
| Lucky9teen
Posted on 01/11/2013 4:24:19 AM PST by Lucky9teen
A guy cruises thru a stop sign and gets pulled over by a local policeman. Guy hands the cop his drivers license, insurance verification, plus his concealed carry permit.
Okay, Mr. Smith, the cop says. I see your CCW permit. Are you carrying today?
Yes, I am.
Well then, better tell me what you got.
Smith says, Well, I got a .357 revolver in my inside coat pocket. Theres a 9mm semi-auto in the glove box. And, Ive got a .22 magnum derringer in my right boot.
Okay, the cop says. Anything else?
Yeah, back in the trunk, theres an AR15 and a shotgun. Thats about it.
Mr. Smith, are you on your way to or from a gun range...?
Nope.
Well then, what are you afraid of...?
Not a damn thing...
Identify this:
This is a picture of:
1.) A 3-year-old's drawing of mountains
2.) Deep thoughts of a suicidal Slinky
3.) An abstract doodle of boobies
4.) Obama's Treasury Secretary nominee's signature
"Are you a Leftwing, Conservative or A Redneck"?
Here is a little test that will help you decide
You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, an Islamic terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you.
You are carrying a Glock cal 40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.
What do you do?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Leftwing's Answer:
Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
Does the man look poor! Or oppressed?
Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
Could we run away?
What does my wife think? What about the kids?
Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?
What does the law say about this situation?
Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?
Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?
Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?
Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?
If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?
Should I call 9-1-1?
Why is this street so deserted?
We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.
This is all so confusing!
I need to discuss with some friends over a latte and try to come to a consensus.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Conservative's Answer:
BANG!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Redneck's Answer:
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! Click....
(sounds of reloading)
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click
Daughter:' Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?'
Son:' You got him, Pop! Can I shoot the next one?'
Wife:' You are not taking that to the taxidermist!
TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: 2ndamendment; guns; ofst; silliness
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-20, 21-40, 41-60, 61-80 ... 121-128 next last
Here's a neat collection:
To: Lucky9teen
2
posted on
01/11/2013 4:28:39 AM PST
by
CPOSharky
(zero slogan: Expect less, pay more. (apologies to Target))
To: 2111USMC; 21stCenturion; 2ndDivisionVet; 3AngelaD; 4mycountry; 5Madman2; 66-442hot; 6amgelsmama; ...
CLICK HERE TO BE INCLUDED OR TAKEN OFF THE LIST
3
posted on
01/11/2013 4:29:27 AM PST
by
Lucky9teen
(Peace is that brief glorious moment in history when everybody stands around reloading.~Thomas Jeffer)
To: 2111USMC; 21stCenturion; 2ndDivisionVet; 3AngelaD; 4mycountry; 5Madman2; 66-442hot; 6amgelsmama; ...
CLICK HERE TO BE INCLUDED OR TAKEN OFF THE LIST
4
posted on
01/11/2013 4:29:27 AM PST
by
Lucky9teen
(Peace is that brief glorious moment in history when everybody stands around reloading.~Thomas Jeffer)
To: 2111USMC; 21stCenturion; 2ndDivisionVet; 3AngelaD; 4mycountry; 5Madman2; 66-442hot; 6amgelsmama; ...
CLICK HERE TO BE INCLUDED OR TAKEN OFF THE LIST
5
posted on
01/11/2013 4:30:27 AM PST
by
Lucky9teen
(Peace is that brief glorious moment in history when everybody stands around reloading.~Thomas Jeffer)
To: Lucky9teen
Wow! Early today.
Happy Friday, FReepers!
To: Lucky9teen
7
posted on
01/11/2013 4:36:28 AM PST
by
cartan
To: Lucky9teen
6.5 Carcano
8
posted on
01/11/2013 4:47:49 AM PST
by
Ratman83
To: Lucky9teen
9
posted on
01/11/2013 4:56:40 AM PST
by
RandallFlagg
("Liberalism is about as progressive as CANCER" -Alfonzo Rachel)
To: Lucky9teen
You forgot this one:
I'll be picking this one up VERY soon:
10
posted on
01/11/2013 5:04:38 AM PST
by
RandallFlagg
("Liberalism is about as progressive as CANCER" -Alfonzo Rachel)
To: RandallFlagg
Would anyone like some eggs?
11
posted on
01/11/2013 5:04:55 AM PST
by
Lucky9teen
(Peace is that brief glorious moment in history when everybody stands around reloading.~Thomas Jeffer)
To: Lucky9teen
You just might be a Redneck
12
posted on
01/11/2013 5:13:08 AM PST
by
fredhead
(It's my Herbie year...check out the number on the side of the famous VW.)
To: Lucky9teen
13
posted on
01/11/2013 5:13:53 AM PST
by
AppyPappy
(You never see a massacre at a gun show.)
To: Lucky9teen
Oh, good LORD!
Is that one on the right lower side Robocop's Beretta?
14
posted on
01/11/2013 5:16:54 AM PST
by
RandallFlagg
("Liberalism is about as progressive as CANCER" -Alfonzo Rachel)
To: RandallFlagg
woot woot. Friday’s rock when you don’t have the flu.
15
posted on
01/11/2013 5:22:16 AM PST
by
Yorlik803
(better to die on your feet than live on your knees.)
To: Lucky9teen
Man, I hope that Nokia isn’t using a Windows operating system. It would be a real downer to have your gun blue-screen while you’re popping zombies in the park.
16
posted on
01/11/2013 5:23:55 AM PST
by
ArGee
(Reality - what a concept.)
To: Lucky9teen
I cannot honestly say that one of my guns was NOT used to kill someone.......two of my pistols were taken off Nazi soldiers by my Dad in 1944-45.
17
posted on
01/11/2013 5:26:38 AM PST
by
fredhead
(It's my Herbie year...check out the number on the side of the famous VW.)
To: Lucky9teen
18
posted on
01/11/2013 5:29:07 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(Trust me: I'm a mother. (Stolen from a T-shirt my sister was wearing.))
To: fredhead
19
posted on
01/11/2013 5:30:02 AM PST
by
ArGee
(Reality - what a concept.)
To: RandallFlagg
If I had a “like” button, I’d hit it! That is a beauty!
20
posted on
01/11/2013 5:30:16 AM PST
by
freebird5850
(The only good thing about Barry getting re-elected is now we get to see him fall from a higher place)
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-20, 21-40, 41-60, 61-80 ... 121-128 next last
Disclaimer:
Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual
posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its
management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the
exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson