Father disowns his gay son in heart-rending letter after he comes out

To: Darteaus94025

Personally, I think he should have done better. Regardless of what level of communication he wanted to pursue he should have explained possibility of repentance and forgiveness to his son. “God doesn’t for you to live this lifestyle” is only the beginning, of what he should have said.

41 posted on 08/08/2012 12:38:24 AM PDT by eclecticEel (Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness: 7/4/1776 - 3/21/2010)

Three boys out of my son’s high school graduating class of a couple of hundred kids, were homosexual. All three died with AIDS. Their lives were gone in their early 20s. What a great lifestyle they had.

If I had a grown child who was homosexual, he/she could not come to my house. That child would have made a choice and I would make a choice.

42 posted on 08/08/2012 12:42:54 AM PDT by Marcella (PREPARE)

This whole "debate" has been framed to benefit the left-wing pro-homosexual people. First, having attraction to members of the same sex does not make you a member of some separate race of people. It means you are a regular person with a sexual disorder. Referring to people as "gay" in the same way some people are white, some black, some asian, etc. frames the entire debate as if homosexuals should be treated as a separate race of people rather than as human beings with a disorder. That is wrong, and every time we, as conservatives, play into that narrative, we already surrender the debate.

It is easy for kids these days to be brainwashed into thinking that "gay rights" is a civil rights issue when we allow gays to thought of as a separate race. After all, if blacks can't help being black and they suffered through slavery and Jim Crow, then why wouldn't we view gays the same way? But once you reframe the debate to where homosexuals are regular people, except they have a sexual disorder, then the entire concept of a civil rights struggle goes away. As long as we treat them and view them as a separate race of people, all of the civil rights arguments stay in place, and those false arguments are used to make the younger generation sympathetic toward all gay causes.

With regards to this father's letter, if we assume it to be true and accurate (what grown man prints a letter like this? It looks like something a kid would write), it should be seen this way: if the son had come to his father and said "Dad, I am struggling with a sexual attraction to men" the father would most likely have been alarmed and would have looked for ways to fix or avert the problem, rather than disowning his son. However, when the son says "I'm coming out officially and declaring myself GAY", this implies that not only does the son have a sexual attraction to men, but that HE HAS EMBRACED not only the sexual nature, but the label and the lifestyle. This is the kid telling his dad that he has thought it over and decided that homosexual behavior is the way to go, and he is going to embrace it fully. Simply having the feelings is not grounds for disowning, but MAKING A DECISION TO EMBRACE A LIFESTYLE is.

I see the kid's official coming out message as sort of an in-your-face challenge to the dad, daring him to reject the kid's choice. And, in doing so, the kid actually betrays the father because he puts the father in a position of either accepting the homosexual lifestyle or rejecting his son. It's the Devil's choice: either 1) embrace homosexuality as normal and healthy and discard your own beliefs, or 2) look like an a-hole for rejecting your son (especially when the son posts your letter on the internet). The son is responsible for this whole mess, and kudos to the dad for making what would inevitably be the harder choice: going against the politically correct, pop-culture opinion. After all, we saw what the Left tried to do to Dan Cathy after he merely expressed his beliefs. The dad here knew he faced the same potential disfavor and harassment.

43 posted on 08/08/2012 1:37:44 AM PDT by fr_freak

To: max americana

His 6 month old pregnant wife...

By any chance, was her name Aisha?

44 posted on 08/08/2012 1:48:18 AM PDT by BykrBayb (Somewhere, my flower is there. ~ Ãž)

If all the kid did was say he was gay and the father reacted this way, the father is wrong. There is nothing principled about the father’s letter. The kid didn’t say he was out having sex or marching in parades. In fact, the father seems incredibly callous and cold. Christianity teaches the difference between being gay and acting on it. I agree that the article is a stupid attempt to tie it to Cathy though.

45 posted on 08/08/2012 2:31:09 AM PDT by Opinionated Blowhard ("When the people find they can vote themselves money, that will herald the end of the republic.")

...there is NOTHING they can do that would cause me to disown them. I love them unconditionally.

Unconditional love is not the issue; the issue is unconditional acceptance.

And I dare say only a fool would pledge unconditional acceptance, even to God himself.

46 posted on 08/08/2012 3:24:28 AM PDT by papertyger ("And how we burned in the camps later, thinking: What would things have been like if..."))

It's as if they can't wait to find any confirmation of "hate" from straights as somehow justification for their own nastiness....

We have a winner!

47 posted on 08/08/2012 3:27:25 AM PDT by papertyger ("And how we burned in the camps later, thinking: What would things have been like if..."))

And why is a vanity posted from Reddit considered “real news”?

Apparently "The Blaze" and "The Daily Mail" consider it news.

48 posted on 08/08/2012 3:30:11 AM PDT by papertyger ("And how we burned in the camps later, thinking: What would things have been like if..."))

... this was precisely the easy answer, the wrong answer, the failed parent's answer, the inhumane answer, the unChristian answer.

Because Christians always go along with what the "world" wants, right?

Peppering your response with insults and false rationalizations doesn't make it any less wrong.

49 posted on 08/08/2012 3:36:26 AM PDT by papertyger ("And how we burned in the camps later, thinking: What would things have been like if..."))

To: Norm Lenhart

So by all means. Please continue helping little ‘johnny’ destroy more families and himself through making it easier for him to do so.

Well said.

50 posted on 08/08/2012 3:41:34 AM PDT by papertyger ("And how we burned in the camps later, thinking: What would things have been like if..."))

To: Lancey Howard

Its not total until one of them dies.

51 posted on 08/08/2012 3:49:35 AM PDT by mazda77 ("Defeating the Totalitarian Lie" By: Hilmar von Campe. Everybody should read it.)

To: Opinionated Blowhard

Christianity teaches the difference between being gay and acting on it.

Do tell! I must have missed that chapter. Could you cite a reference, please?

52 posted on 08/08/2012 3:52:06 AM PDT by papertyger ("And how we burned in the camps later, thinking: What would things have been like if..."))

To: Opinionated Blowhard

Please explain E X A C T L Y how one can be gay ‘without acting on it.

This is the problem. The left has so thoroughly reframed and co opted the very language and definition of the issue that everyone else is spinning their wheels arguing logical falacys.

If you take away the sex, you have two people with desires that total 2% of the population. There CANNOT be homosexuality without sex. Without the sex, they are celabate friends.A man/woman can ‘feel’ any number of emotions and experience all manner of lust. But Sexual activity, which is what homosexuality is, is a rock solid requirement.

53 posted on 08/08/2012 3:55:51 AM PDT by Norm Lenhart

To: Norm Lenhart

This is the problem. The left has so thoroughly reframed and co opted the very language and definition of the issue that everyone else is spinning their wheels arguing logical falacys.

And we must challenge that meme at every opportunity.

54 posted on 08/08/2012 4:04:41 AM PDT by papertyger ("And how we burned in the camps later, thinking: What would things have been like if..."))

But as someone who works in the theatre in NYC, I can tell you that the gay community is NOT nice and kind to each other. Once you are in the group, you have to be prepared for a lot of bile, insults and conformity. Individual gay men can be nice; but put them together at a party and you have a mixture of The Boys in the Band and feeding time at the zoo.

55 posted on 08/08/2012 4:13:37 AM PDT by miss marmelstein

It's BS. At least the part where he claimed his father immediately disowned him after a near silent phone conversation.

A father that cares enough about his son to be in his life (rare these days) and write a letter (even more rare these days) would have a face-to-face with him first.

I only see two possibilities:

-The letter is completely fake.

-The letter came after a long time of instigating or rubbing it in for not accepting his lifestyle. Always bringing it up, bringing ‘boyfriends’ over(probably why he's banned from the house), showing pictures of how ‘happy’ he is at ‘gay’ getaways/parades, etc. I'm in NYC and know good number of people in the ‘community’. This is pretty typical when such a situation occurs.

I personally don't have a problem with them as long as they keep it private and, IMO , the government should not be involved in any marriage at all(no licenses, records, tax rules, official divorces, etc). In both straight and 'gay' unions, it should be a purely private matter with legal paperwork filed for any joint rights/responsibilities - joint accounts, hospital visits, power of attorney, contracts, etc. Any two (or more) people can already legally establish such rights - married or not. And no, I don't support adoption or artificial fertilization without an already existing male/female union with child-care contract.

And IMO, the military should have the right to select or reject any soldier they want - it is a cohesive unit fighting for life or death, not a damn starbucks - there's no room for any damn PC there.

56 posted on 08/08/2012 5:06:39 AM PDT by varyouga

Therein lies the problem.

57 posted on 08/08/2012 5:16:47 AM PDT by Venturer

I wouldn’t cut the kid off from home, but it would be understood his butt buddy wasn’t welcome there.

I wouldn’t be giving wedding receptions with all of his pervert friends there with my family and would make it clear that because I loved him I would gladly pay for help with his sickness.

58 posted on 08/08/2012 5:21:45 AM PDT by Venturer

If there’s any indication the kid wants help or isn’t ‘convinced’ f his problem, then I totally agree. Help all one could possibly do. But if they are in you face “Gay and Proud” Then that’s their choice.

As a side note, you brought up weddings etc. The selfishness of the homo results in nothing but chaos for the family when it comes to family events as well. Think about ‘the one’ regular ‘problem child’ EVERY family has at least one of. Christmas, weddings, BBQs ... all of it. If there are 100 people at the event, 90 of them are on eggshels because no one wants to ‘ruin it’ for everyone by saying something when the probchild has his/her attention grabbing scene. Or most likely, many AVOID family events BECAUSE of these types.

My family had several of the regular type and it was hell. The selfishness of these people is boundless and when Homo is thrown in the mix it multiplies by orders of magnitude.

No good EVER results from homosexuality and catering to it. But a lifetime of pain and suffering for everyone involved does.

59 posted on 08/08/2012 5:35:52 AM PDT by Norm Lenhart

Maybe the lost boy is actually related to Alcee Hastings of Florida? That mere politician came out of the closet recently to tell the Huff and Puff that Mr.Allen West offended the entire Black Caucus,supposedly six months before the Baptist Press published an interview with Dan Cathy. Yet somehow
Alcee understood it was all tied to the Chick -fil-A controversy. When it takes a Democrat or a Reprobate so long to process the information somehow it does not ring true.

60 posted on 08/08/2012 5:41:12 AM PDT by StonyBurk (ring)

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794