Posted on 07/06/2012 6:11:27 AM PDT by Lucky9teen
When things in your life seem, almost too much to handle, When 24 Hours in a day is not enough, Remember the jar and 2 cups of coffee. ‘Take care of the golf balls first — The things that really matter.
Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.
One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented.
The professor smiled ‘I’m glad you asked’.
It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, There’s always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend.’
Stop it I think I’m gonna Blow....
This may be an old one but I’ll recycle it anyway.
A bar began construction on a building expansion to increase business. In response, the local Baptist Church started a campaign to block the bar from expanding with petitions and prayers. Work progressed right up until the week before the grand reopening when lightning struck the bar and it burned to the ground!
After the bar burned to the ground, the church folks were rather smug in their outlook, bragging about “the power of prayer”, until the bar owner sued the church on the grounds that the church ... “was ultimately responsible for the demise of his building, either through direct or indirect actions or means.”
In its reply to the court, the church vehemently denied all responsibility or any connection to the building’s demise.
The judge read through the plaintiff’s complaint and the defendant’s reply, and at the opening hearing he commented, “I don’t know how I’m going to decide this, but it appears from the paperwork that we have a bar owner who believes in the power of prayer, and an entire church congregation that now does not.”
MISERY REPEATS ITSELF
This is a true but strange story which proves that misery can indeed repeat itself, that those unwilling to learn their lessons from history are doomed to repeat it.
Jimmy Carter was born in 1937, the year of the Ox.
Barack Obama was born in 1961, the year of the Ox.
24 years apart.
Jimmy Carter was the first president to be born in a hospital.
Barack Obama was the first president to be born in two hospitals.
In 2002, Jimmy Carter received a Nobel Peace Prize.
In 2009, Barack Obama received a Nobel Peace Prize.
7 years apart.
Jimmy Carter ran his family’s peanut farm.
Barack Obama’s favorite snacks are chocolate-peanut protein bars.
The names Jimmy Carter and Barack Obama each contain eleven letters,
The names Gerald Ford and George Bush each contain nine letters.
Barack Obama has a pet dog named Bo.
Jimmy Carter had a pet dog named Bozo.
Jimmy Carter is a distant cousin of Motown Records founder Berry Gordy.
Barack Obama is a distanced relation of countless half-brothers and half-sisters.
Jimmy Carter had an embarassing brother named Billy.
Barack Obama has an embarassing brother named Abongo.
The names Billy Carter and Abongo Obama each contain eleven letters.
Billy Carter had his own beer.
Barack Obama had his own beer summit.
Jimmy Carter pardoned draft dodgers and later re-instated the draft.
Barack Obama claimed to have registered for the draft a year before it was re-instated.
Both President Carter and President Obama bailed out automobile manufacturers.
Both President Carter and President Obama were concerned with the issue of nationalizing health care coverage.
Both President Carter and President Obama chided Americans to get over setting the thermostat at whatever temperature they wanted.
Jimmy Carter and Barack Obama opposed Gitmo and the war against Saddam Hussein and supported Hugo Chavez.
In 2000, Carter severed ties with the Southern Baptist Convention, saying the group’s doctrines did not align with his Christian beliefs.
In 2000, Obama severed ties with the Trinity United Church of Christ, saying he could no more distance himself from Jeremiah Wright than he could disown an uncle.
Jimmy Carter was voted out of office with a 34% approval rating and a rising misery index.
President Ronald Reagan once said, “A recession is when your neighbor is out of work, a depression is when you are out of work, and a recovery happens when Jimmy Carter is out of work.” He also said that facts are funny things.
Can history repeat itself? Only you can decide.
... and any liberal you find
“Sally sits on Schlitz all day”
... and any liberal you find
Sure, why not? Most of 'em are already "neutered" in the figurative sense...
Probably put there by the same guy who put the fence post turtle in the White House.
New Obama Army
http://youtu.be/CQQI-2tT-nU
January 29, 2009
“I saw someone breaking the law so I arrested them.”That’s the way Green County Sheriff’s deputy Marcus Horna describes it. The incident he refers to happened last wednesday on highway 311 near the Ghor rd. intersection. Janice Behr was pulled on the shoulder because her tire blew out. Behr called 911 for assistance and Deputy Horna responded to the call.
As he approached the vehicle, Deputy Horna was caught on dashcam footage violating a department policy. Footage shows him walk out of his car with a cigarette clearly dangling from his left hand. Behr, who works for a BP station, had just delivered some plastic cans of gasoline to a local hardware store because of a special trade arrangement the two businesses share. Unknown to Behr, some gas had splashed out onto her back seat. Dashcam footage then shows Deputy Horna, with total disregard for Behr’s vehicle, flick his cigarette into the back seat of her car.
“It seemed managable and this is my only car,” is the excuse Behr offers for trying to put the fire out instead of leaving the car. Footage shows her lean into the back seat and begin smacking at the flames while Deputy Horna looks on. After some seconds, flames can be seen moving to the front seat, where Behr’s right arm catches fire. She then runs out of the vehicle in a panic, waving her arm around like something out of a movie.
But what happens next is the most surprising. Footage shows Deputy Horna rush over to Behr, where he grabs her by the neck and throws her to the ground. Behr believed that Horna was trying to put her out, which he did, but only because he was handcuffing her. Incredibly, Behr can be heard on camera wailing in agonizing pain while Horna drags her up by the very arm that was burning and pulls her back to his patrol car.
When asked to defend his actions Deputy Horna repeated his earlier statement, “I saw someone breaking the law so I arrested them.” When pressed for further comment he added, “The woman leaped out the car with her arm on fire and was whirling about like a maniac so I cuffed her and charged her. It is against the law to do that, you can’t run around with your arm in flames, so I charged her.”
And what was the charge?
“Illegal use of a firearm,” Horna says.
Deputy Horna is currently on paid administrative leave, but is expected to return this month because he is the only person with a key to the garage.
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