I would carve out an exception: men can be "just friends" with a woman they are not at all sexually attracted to. You can be friends with a much, much older woman, for example.
For a woman you would find sexually attractive to any degree, intimacy will tend to lead to desire, which will lead to frustration if the desire is not reciprocated. Even if you initially don't think the woman is all that "hot", friendly intimacy would lead to increasing sexual interest.
“For a woman you would find sexually attractive to any degree, intimacy will tend to lead to desire, which will lead to frustration if the desire is not reciprocated. Even if you initially don’t think the woman is all that “hot”, friendly intimacy would lead to increasing sexual interest.”
I agree. If there is even the tiniest thing that a man finds attractive about a woman, the possiblity for shenanigans exists.
We’re not trying to be pigs. When we like a women we want to have sex with her. It’s not meant to be an insult.
“The world view of the interviewees is too narrow.”
No. That’s what the question is about. Not just ANYONE in the whole world including people who could be one of your grandparents. It’s about someone who is one of your ‘contemporaries’ so to speak. Someone you could be expected to date - as it is generally understood.
I guess I felt that it went without saying but the context here is men and women that COULD be attracted to one another. A lot of age separation? Not what I was talking about. When most people have this discussion they’re talking about two adults in the same general age catagory. I guess I should have been more specific.
More hooey. Lots of the women I’m friends with are very attractive, and if we were both single I’d certainly make a play. But I understand the greater reality, I ain’t single and it’s not looking like that’s changing any time soon, most of them ain’t single, so we’re friends. And no it doesn’t lead to desire, just gotta know how to keep your brain in charge.
I wonder how many of the folks who think men and women can’t be friends play the lottery. A lot of folks play the lottery because they like to dream the “what would happen if”, which is really similar to why they say men and women can’t be friends. I don’t play the lottery, I find “what would happen if” dreams annoying because they draw your focus away from the good stuff you have. I have a great wife, no reason to replace her, so my female friends are “just” friends because there’s no reason to wonder if, if ain’t happening and I really would rather it stay that way.