Old Butch
John was in the fertilized egg business.
He had several hundred young layers (hens), called ‘pullets,’ and ten roosters to fertilize the eggs.
He kept records, and any rooster not performing went into the soup pot and was replaced.
This took a lot of time, so he bought some tiny bells and attached them to his roosters.
Each bell had a different tone, so he could tell from a distance, which rooster was performing.
Now, he could sit on the porch and fill out an efficiency report by just listening to the bells.
John’s favourite rooster, old Butch, was a very fine specimen, but this morning he noticed old Butch’s bell hadn’t rung at all!
When he went to investigate, he saw the other roosters were busy chasing pullets, bells-a-ringing, but the pullets, hearing the roosters coming, would run for cover.
To John’s amazement, old Butch had his bell in his beak, so it couldn’t ring.
He’d sneak up on a pullet, do his job and walk on to the next one.
John was so proud of old Butch, he entered him in the Renfrew County Fair and he became an overnight sensation among the judges.
The result was the judges not only awarded old Butch the “No Bell Piece Prize,” but they also awarded him the “Pulletsurprise” as well.
Clearly old Butch was a Democrat in the making. Who else but a Democrat could figure out how to win two of the most coveted awards on our planet by being the best at sneaking up on the unsuspecting populace and screwing them when they weren’t paying attention.
VOTE CAREFULLY THIS YEAR, THE BELLS ARE NOT ALWAYS AUDIBLE!!!
A Farmer was looking for a new rooster because he thought the one he had was getting too old. Other farmers brought young roosters to him to try out.
Old roosters are smarter than young ones, though.
When new roosters showed up the old one would tell the new one he didn’t want to wind up in the soup pot. So he said to the younger ones we will race around the house and when we got to the front porch where the farmer was sitting he should lag back and let the old rooster stay about two yards ahead.
So they raced and the younger rooster lagged back.
The farmer saw this and grabbed his shotgun and shot the young rooster.
He turned to his neighbor and exclaimed “ That is the third queer rooster I’ve shot this week!”