I went to XD. I like very much. I like the wife to have a .357 snubby chambered with .38s. It is no frills, few moving parts, double action, no hammer.......Semi auto would be dangerouse for my wife.
If you can get your hands on one (maybe you have one) shoot a .45xd and a .40 Glock (same barrel length to be fair) for comparison.