Marines ban farting to avoid offending Muslims

Jihad Watch ^ | August 24th, 2011

[Halfmanhalfamazing]

There are so many weird aspects of this story. Don't these Marines have mothers, or someone in their lives who told them as children that audible passing of gas was offensive? And the high command has to tell them to cut it out because it offends Afghans, as if such a reaction were different from that of any normal person? And unfortunately, the friendly-fire jihad attacks by Afghans that regularly punctuate the working relationship between U.S. and Afghan troops are not going to be ended by this small gesture in "trust building." "For Marines in Afghanistan: be careful where you fart," by Gina Cavallaro in Military Times, August 23 (thanks to David):

[Halfmanhalfamazing]

In a sane media world, this would be a front page story. Here on FR, this has to qualify.

[gunnyg]

F@rt proudly, Lads!

Semper Fiselis!

[gunnyg]

F@rt proudly, Lads!

Semper Fidelis!

[dragnet2]

Get our people the hell out of there.

[dfwgator]

They must have declared a Fatwa on me by now. (or is that Fartwa?)

[NCC-1701]

“...Semper Fidelis!...”

Semper F@rtdelis!

[gov_bean_ counter]

This from people who hose their a$$ off in the bathroom...

[Dallas59]

I'm buying a crate...

[Husker24]

They don't want to offend people who wipe their ass with their bare hands? I'm guessing the average Afghan doesn't exactly bathe on a regular basis. A fart would probably actually freshen things up a little out there.

[HiTech RedNeck]

Beano

[EnglishCon]

You ever tried NOT to fart after an MRE?

[Hillarys Gate Cult]

Just heard this on the radio referring to it as the “Don’t ask, don’t smell” policy.

[rdcbn]

Get our people the hell out of there.

Or at least get them better quality food

[RichInOC]

Gentlemen, it’s not our Marines’ fault that you guys can’t make those sounds anymore because of all the sodomy.

[Cowgirl of Justice]

These are the people who think it is ok to screw a goat but not to eat it immediately afterward. But it is ok for them to sell that goat to a neighbor to eat.

[Bloody Sam Roberts]

With apologies to Robert Burns:

Ode Tae a Fart...

Oh whit a sleekit horrible beastie
Lurks in yer belly efter the feastie
Jist as ye sit doon among yer kin
There sterts tae stir an enormous win'
The neeps 'n' tatties 'n' mushy peas
Stert workin' like a gentle breeze
But soon the puddin' wi' the sauncie face
Will hae ye blawin' a' ower the place
Nae maiter whit the hell ye dae
A'bodys gonnae hiv tae pay
Even if ye try tae stifle
It's like a bullet oot a rifle
Hawd yer bum ticht tae the chair
Tae try an' stop the leakin' air
Shify yersel fae cheek tae cheek
Prae tae God it disnae reek
But aw yer efforts go assunder
Oot it comes like a clap o' thunder
Ricochets aroon the room
Michty me a sonic boom
God almichty it fairly reeks
Hope a huvnae shit ma breeks
Tae the bog a better scurry
Aw whit the hell, it's no ma worry
A'body roon aboot me chokin
Wan or twa are nearly bokin
A'll feel better for a while
Cannae help but raise a smile
Wis him! A shout wi' accusin glower
Alas too late, he's jist keeled ower
Ye dirty bugger they shout and stare
A dinnae feel welcome ony mair
Where e'er ye be let yer wind gang free
Sounds like jist the job fur me
Whit a fuss at Rabbie's party
Ower the sake o' wan wee farty

[dragnet2]

Lets hope when their lopping off heads, the victim don’t offend them by farting.

[dfwgator]

They've already declared a Jihad on this guy.

[gleeaikin]

All right, FR comedians, let her rrripp!!

[Man from Oz]

My favorite beans in a can except with Jalapenos!!!