Posted on 05/21/2011 1:18:37 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows
“Don’t want me to go snowboarding, hiking, surfing or whatever? Better come up something better to do and fun but I won’t give up my entire life.”
This is what I run into in my age demographic. I am still an active athlete in my 50’s (bicycle racing, cross country skiing). I also like exploring some trail I have not been on, or kayaking some new river/lake, what have you. And the women I run in to are into convention that is downright mind numbing. At my age I am not supposed to do anything more strenuous than slow walking.
I hate to tell you, but the hot-cold game is usually the first sign for me to run away. It only gets worse from there. Finding someone who is consistent is one of the hardest things in life. Good luck.
Well said
After three marriages and Umpte umph “relationships” I have finally found a woman that meets those standards-so far,
And she has a career, doesn’t want to get married and the kids are out of the house. Feeling pretty lucky.
I hope for two things-that this lasts and you find the same-they are rare
“Are there any good single women out there these days...?”
Sure. If you don’t mind divorced and fifty and lovin’ it, debt free (except for my manageable farm mortgage), step sons who don’t expect a hand-out from me, hard-working, God-fearing, retired Army, averagely attractive, still has all of her own teeth and needs no major dental work (LOL!), physically fit, funny, happy, upbeat, an excellent cook & baker, gardens & grows her own food and raises chickens, loves Nature and would rather be outside than in, is educated, a voracious reader, loves to hunt & fish, possesses a positive ‘can-do’ attitude, and is a political clone of Margaret Thatcher...then, I’m out there! :)
Ergo, consider them as they are and “demonstrate” your attraction, your appreciation and love.
Heck, say it first thing in the morning...
Nope. I like my toys and stuff.
If you read further down you would see that I will probably cave, a lot. But, there needs to be some reasonableness and just be nice.
Saying “Do this!” ain’t going to go well. I am the number one child out of six. When you live with your competitors for 18 years you get good at not being a rug.
Same thing being single and it can be the same if one is married.
We have no right to demand of each other or treat the other like a rug.
We also can’t treat others as some lightswitch, turning them on only when we need them.
Parity and equality have to be the minimum demand if there is one, with mutual respect and regard for the others point of view or needs.
What I was saying is “Don’t expect me to drop my identity and become your garden gnome”, it won’t work, won’t go over well and will only result in resentment.
I likewise will treat her the same, probably better.
Of the relationships I have been in they weren’t miserable because of me and I did what I could to salvage the relationship as well them.
If we are to be monogamous that is a two way street. I won’t cheat on them to get back a them but we will discuss what is going and what direction they want to go.
Usually, it turns out the want to go back to the way their life was. I don’t begrudge them and don’t call them names.
Stuff happens and most times things don’t work out. We still remain friends.
Others decided to abuse themselves and compound it with cheating.
Wonder why it didn’t work out?
I am not here to save anyone. I’ll help but there has to be a point where it’s not in my interest to continue and that’s both sad and a tough thing.
Gawd! I have to watch that!
Luck you and she sounds like what I expect in my “near” ideal woman.
Isn’t there a cream for that?
She looks better as a fat man than she would as a fat woman.
Poor kid—look at the whacko parents that she had!
Oh dear. I just realized that I’m a happily married woman on a singles’ thread.
But thanks for the ping anyway, Slings.
And go get ‘em!
“The latest generations are so insecure and emotionally needy they practically walk around crying.”
Well, yes, but a lot of them didn’t have mothers and fathers who loved htem enough to pick responsibly and stay together.
I had a stage 5 clinger who wanted me to meet his family, his children, and didn't want to date anyone else but me- all on the first date! Freshly divorced after 15 years too. He didn't like it that I don't move that fast. LOL.
I'm 42 and still hold very old fashioned, conservative values when it comes to matters of the heart. In a fast world, taking things slow can sometimes not mesh for some. It's been the biggest challenge in my dating life.
“Why? Because they are responsible, honorable, smart enough to project what the future holds, they are not libertines, and are kind to others.”
And as such they don’t want to get mixed up with some deeply damaged/dysfunctional person who will end up turning their lives upside down and then proceeding to destroy it. They are being smart and there are few decent women out there (being a woman I understand completely) who have not completely messed up their lives during their teens and twenties.
The real trick is finding decent men and women who have fallen through the cracks. They usually do’nt overtly advertise themselves.
Sometimes a taco is just a taco.
No worries. Have some popcorn.
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