First of all, ignore any snarky comments on this thread. You are reaching out to us and some of us know exactly what you are going through. If you want, feel free to write me privately.
What others have said may be right: you might have a serious case of depression - a condition that can be either controlled or cured. So please go to a good doctor - preferably a psychiatrist. Make sure the psychiatrist is sympathetic and kind. If he/she is not, get the hell out of the office. Then, take your meds - all the while keeping in touch with your doctor - if meds aren’t taken properly and monitored by a doctor - they can lead to even more problems. When correctly applied, they can change your life.
It also sounds to me like you HATE your job. There is nothing more depressing than being in the wrong job. Here, I truly feel for you.
There are many kind people on this board - and many will recommend that you return to God. Although I can’t really believe, I would take their advice.
Good luck to you, God bless you and keep in touch. Miss M cares!
I thought about something like you say — that or a B12 deficiency, or similar. But who knows?
So I took this ultra-vain lament of the poster’s as something from someone perfectly sane and healthy and responded appropriately.
NO!!!!!! he has a very mild form of depression if he even has it. NO MEDS, James -- they are horrible. Only if you feel you are tempted to end it all should you go to a pill-pushing MD. If you just need someone to help you do things to make your life more meaningful, you should choose a BEHAVIORAL PSYCHOLOGIST who will help you in small ways to get you off the couch and out there into life a bit more, with no ghastly side effects of SSRIs. And believe me, if you walk into a MD, a psychiatrist's office, he will be the hammer and you will look like a nail, and he will put you on meds you do NOT need. Start with upping your nutrition as in my previous post. It will be better for you and faster working than SSRI meds. I believe you will be fine with mild adjustments in diet and lifestyle.