Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior

Wall Street Journal ^ | JANUARY 8, 2011 | AMY CHUA

[nickcarraway]

Can a regimen of no playdates, no TV, no computer games and hours of music practice create happy kids? And what happens when they fight back?

A lot of people wonder how Chinese parents raise such stereotypically successful kids. They wonder what these parents do to produce so many math whizzes and music prodigies, what it's like inside the family, and whether they could do it too. Well, I can tell them, because I've done it. Here are some things my daughters, Sophia and Louisa, were never allowed to do:

have a playdate

• be in a school play

• complain about not being in a school play

• watch TV or play computer games

• choose their own extracurricular activities

• get any grade less than an A

• not be the No. 1 student in every subject except gym and drama

• play any instrument other than the piano or violin

• not play the piano or violin.

I'm using the term "Chinese mother" loosely. I know some Korean, Indian, Jamaican, Irish and Ghanaian parents who qualify too. Conversely, I know some mothers of Chinese heritage, almost always born in the West, who are not Chinese mothers, by choice or otherwise. I'm also using the term "Western parents" loosely. Western parents come in all varieties.

[triumphant values]

Life is tough, then you die. Third world parents really get that.

The third world is the third world because of third world parents. They don't get that.

Rich Americans often miss that.

Rich Americans almost always miss that. Otherwise they wouldn't be letting them in here.

[fishtank]

Savage just highlighted this article.

HE LOVED IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[narses]

“The third world is the third world because of third world parents.”

And this article helps explain how China is moving out of the third world hell. Sadly it exposes an weakened American family that may move us into a third world status.

[dsc]

“And this sort of crap is why the suicide rate in Japan is so high.”

The subject here is China, not Japan. Which is rather like saying, “The subject here is Finland, not Botswana.”

I get the impression that more kids in Japan commit suicide because they’re picked on by their classmates than for any other reason.

[TheDingoAteMyBaby]

If you had to make a list of 100 famous Jewish Americans in any field - art, politics, literature, journalism, music, science, entertainment - it would be very easy. If you had to make the same list of 100 famous Chinese Americans, that would probably take much longer.

I think the difference is that Jewish families emphasize hard work as well, but it is also balanced with people skills, being comfortable in the spotlight, accepting confrontation. In other words, extroversion.

[luckystarmom]

I have a daughter with a brain injury. Is she of any less value than her “gifted” brother or sister?

Thank God, she has a lot of faith, and she knows her true value with God.

She is also sweeter and a harder worker than her brother and sister. She wants to be an accountant, and she will probably make a lot more money than her brother and sister because of hard work.

[Hot Tabasco]

I have a daughter with a brain injury. Is she of any less value than her “gifted” brother or sister?

Did I or anyone else here say she was? If I'm not mistaken the article was addressing how China and their students are far outpacing ours in the academic arena with the emphasis on their parents demanding excelence in academics rather than self esteem and sports that our society has seemed to have adopted.

[luckystarmom]

You had a pretty harsh response to “not everyone can get an A”.

It should be okay to not get an A if someone is doing the best they can.

Two of my kids easily bet A’s without cracking a book, and the other one studies to get A’s and B’s.

I think we should award people for working hard and doing their very best.