Posted on 10/21/2010 8:09:47 PM PDT by Sybeck1
Today my 12 year old daughter was in class when a student came in and asked her if she would come into the hall to talk to the police. When she went into the hallway a police officer explained that she needed to go to the principal's office with him and she then asked if she was in trouble. He gave her no reply. He asked her if she wanted to walk by herself so she wouldn't be seen with him and she said, "No, I don't care." When she finally arrived at the principal's office across campus there were four other officers present along with the assistant principal. The assistant principal had a letter written which was threatening to kill a fifth grader who was at another school across town. It said, "I'm going to kill you." Signed "My daughter, 7th Grader." The 5th grader claimed that my daughter was threatening her with notes on the bus.
My daughter does not ride a bus. My wife is a teacher and we live in another city. She rides to school with my wife. My daughter knows the little girl's older sister from church, and to my knowledge the older sister of the accuser is my daughter's friend. She spent the night at our house once.
These police officers proceeded to question her several several minutes. The school never contacted us. The police officer told my daughter to be sure and tell her mother about it.
Then my daughter had to RUN back across campus, all the time crying and knowing that people saw her with a police officer, THE ONE THEY ALL KNOW RUNS THE BULLYING PROGRAM AT THE SCHOOL.
My son is in 8th grade and heard that his sister "was in trouble with the police." My daughter's reputation has been ruined by someone who simply does not like her. This person chose to try to get her in trouble for that reason and that reason only. Isn't that bullying in itself? Can my daughter be questioned without a parent present?
1. No school is going to allow a parent to specify disciplinary action against any child.
2.Moving schools is not realistic because attendance is by zones. You can move to a private school or homeschool.
3.If you have $250/hour to waste on an attorney, good for you! All you’ll do is enrich the attorney
4.A better recourse is to write the School Board with a calm, factual and non-threatening letter and work things through the bureaucracy. You can’t get in a “way back” machine and undo things. What you can do is influence the district’s procedures and guidelines for handling situations in the future.
5.I spent my career running public schools. First, people make mistakes, sometimes stupid mistakes. That’s inevitable. Second, among kids situations like these have a shelf life of about two days. Life is not always fair.
I'm sorry, but that is just ridiculous. If there is a problem between two little kids, the first thing you do is talk to the two little kids. You don't run fingerprint tests, DNA samples, lie detector tests, or call Scotland Yard in. And the cops' top priority can't be worrying about if it'll upset the child to be asked questions. You handle the stuff there and then.
They had many options based on innocent until proven guilty. For example they could have asked the accuser whose fingerprints might be found on the paper. The result of a question like that might make the story seem even fishier. And so forth with many, many, easy options to get to the bottom of it.
What of any substance can be accomplished by police taking a little girl out of class? Nothing. All she can say is I didn't do it or I did it. Either way, what she says will be uninformative. In the first case she might be liying and in the second case she could just have said she did it out of intimidation, or suggestion, or submission to adult. Either way, nothing is learned.
If the note accusation is of any interest to authorities, they should be required to find out some objective facts before humiliating a child and causing her social problems with her peers.
Exactly. As I said, there is plenty of precedent on how the set-up for the questioning — where it takes place, who is present, etc. — itself becomes intimidation.
This sounds completely goofy. Almost as if they weren’t taking it seriously at all and, therefore, weren’t even thinking about good procedures.
Seems like what they should have been doing is putting together a case against the person making the false allegation.
Why be so upset? Because the other kids will start (and in this case have started) rumors that the child is “in trouble with the police.” Then the garbage hits Facebook and goes out worldwide, becoming not only embellished at every turn but essentially made permanent.
This can then snowball into more and more trouble, all based on the wrong initial conclusion that so-and-so had been “in trouble with the police.”
No person should ever permit themselves to be interviewed by police other than in the presence of their attorney. Nothing good ever comes from this.
He's not asking strangers, he's asking FReepers. I have gotten myself out of a pickle or two with FReeper advice. See, the best things about asking FReepers for advice is that you'll most likely get something objective and without emotion.
You can't control what children say, so why even try? Its like herding chickens. One can only act properly, and it seems this family and their child handled it very well. They have nothing to be ashamed of. The police also seemed to handle it professionally. They have their rules also, and had to do it "by the book."
Why cause so much upset to oneself by holding the grudge?
they will not help if the child is in public school.
This is nowhere near “holding a grudge.” For the life of me, I can’t fathom how you got “holding a grudge” out any of the concerns expressed for how this was handled and how badly things could have gone for an innocent child.
It’s useful and right to examine whether a situation should be addressed further. To do so is not “holding a grudge.”
And it rather misses the point to state the obvious, that what kids say “can’t be controlled.” In fact, that IS the point. Which is why these types of situation that needlessly provide fodder to the Facebook rumor mill should be avoided, if possible, not always simply shrugged at with an “oh well.”
In my humble opinion, you are vastly underrating the amount of longterm damage a vicious permanent rumor mill on Facebook can do to a child (or anyone else, for that matter).
OK then. Go out and start chasing down those internet rumors and everyone who has issued them. Go after the police with their internal affairs Dept. Sue the school. Contact every parent of every child connected to declare your child's innocence.
Good luck!
Similar thing happened to my son when he was a Jr., much older.
Some yout named Josh and a group of silly girls who wanted attention they were not getting conspired to claim that the son and his friends had said they were going burn Josh’s house. This was shortly after Columbine.
The assistant principal met the boys at each class change and dogged their tracks from class to class. He also had the campus cop, who took time from ogling high school girls and eating donuts, question the boys.
The son and his buddies were not above tormenting any fool they could make look more foolish and soon the AP had contrived a conspiracy. This is when I was called and got involved and yes, I did know about the previous encounters.
I went down, examined the facts and there were none available from the accusers. There was also only innuendo and circumstantial evidence of the conspiracy. I provided a litany of reasonable questions to the AP and he seemed to realize he had been taken. I ended the discussion by telling him that I had already contacted my attorney and that any further communication would be from him and furthermore that he would be sending a cease and desist letter. I said this kind of thing gets out of hand quickly and I would not tolerate anymore accusations like this without fighting back... I had a case.
It ended. We graduated public school and if I had young children again they would never set foot in public school... it is insane.
A) Instruct your children - They DO not and WILL NOT “talk” with the police without your being there. Period. Inform the school of same - in writing, keep a copy.
B) Tell the Administrator that you will “seek council” to be “made whole” due the trauma your child suffered due entirely to their “proven incompetence”.
C) Insist the real author of the note be expelled immediately for making “terroristic threats” as required by MISSISSIPPI SCHOOL SAFETY ACT OF 2001. (Interesting law BTW)
D) Strongly consider pulling your child and insist the District provide an in home tutor until YOU are certain the threat to your child has been resolved.
or
Best outcome) Home school you child.
How ridiculous.
ok, maybe wrong
still sick
“ok, maybe wrong
still sick”
Most definitely.
“In my humble opinion, you are vastly underrating the amount of longterm damage a vicious permanent rumor mill on Facebook can do to a child (or anyone else, for that matter).”
100% on target. All records, generally.
They are obligated to investigate anything that is suspicious. Sounds like you should be able to clear it up with no problem.
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