Posted on 06/03/2010 7:33:19 AM PDT by re_tail20
Fourteen-year-old Rekha Kalindi, who lives in an eastern India village roiled by starvation and underdevelopment, has never watched India's screen divas portray empowered women in lavish Bollywood movies.
Living in a mud hut on one meal a day, Rekha this year made a long journey by train from this obscure hamlet in West Bengal to India's prosperous capital, New Delhi — where she was feted by the country's first female president, Pratibha Patil.
The act that brought her fame: Rekha said "no."
The girl said "no" to her parents when they arranged her marriage at age 13 last year, an audacity that sent ripples throughout a region where girls had never got up courage to defy their elders.
"My sister Jyotsna, now 16, got married at 12 and has already had four dead babies. She now lives with her second husband because the first one left her. Still, my parents wanted me to also get married, but I said no, I want to study. They finally agreed," Rekha said.
She became an icon overnight in the region as the story of her defiance spread.
In India's rural areas, steeped in tradition and seared by poverty, girls are revolting against early, arranged marriages with support from some government officials and international aid groups such as UNICEF, which is setting up schools for child laborers to make them aware of their rights to break a rife but outlawed practice.
(Excerpt) Read more at washingtontimes.com ...
I hope that this brave young lady gets her wish to become educated and then make her life choices.
Indian girls are hawt
I’m certainly against arranged marriages at early changes where the girl (or boy) is unwilling. In India’s urban, middle-class families, arranged marriages are still quite common, and the prospective spouses both have “vetos”. I think this system works pretty well — it has worked for me. I’m happily married with three children.
After some of the guys my daughter has picked, I think arranged marriages might be a good idea! LOL
“In India’s urban, middle-class families, arranged marriages are still quite common, and the prospective spouses both have “vetos””
Sounds more like a blind date than an arranged marriage
lol
We have Indian friends whose marriage was arranged. They think our customs are odd adn too prone to failure. They plan to arrange the marriages for their children, I wish them luck though. Their kids are very marican oriented in everything they do outside the home.
Indian women are Hawt. Indian girls are, well, girls.
marican should be American
One of my coworkers is Indian and had an arranged marriage. It looks like it works just fine. I have often think when I look at similar girls her age that they might have done better if a mature person had helped them make a better decision about a life partner.
My next door neighbor runs an Neonatal ICU. Wife former bigwig computer expert, MIT, retired pre-boom with serious $$$.
Both Indian. Arranged marriage. Three sons.
We drink beer periodically in my back yard. My wife is a doctor at his hospital.
I have many daughters (and only daughters).
He and his wife were a little tipsy and stated that we had beautiful daughters, they were all very smart and strong, and that his sons were willing to convert to Judaism to marry them. He knew the ins-and-outs of Orthodox coversion, gained on the internet.
He was very interested in having Jewish grandchildren.
It was pretty surprising.
That said, these are good boys, smart (each one top of the class), lovely to my daughters (as they all run around and push each other into the pool), and I like the parents very much.
I would not be overly surprised if it works out.
I’ll report back in 15 years.
I grew up during a time & in an ethnic neighborhood, where Italian immigrants were arranging marriages. I would see the couple walking down the street with one of their mother’s or an aunt or grandmother (dressed in all in black) walking several steps behind them.
I felt sad for the girl.
Have seen arranged marriages turn out both ways - good and bad. My own parents-in-law had an arranged marriage, and they are a fantastic couple. It’s not something I’d be interested in doing for my own future children.
Arranged introductions are a different story - those are common all over the world.
Its not like you are arranging something between two strangers. These families know each other or they are friends of friends. It happens here too, “Hey, have I got a girl for you” type of introduction. Worried about failure? I’ve learned from 3 marriages and other relationships, look at the mom, that’s what the daughter is going to become. I can say it was true in every case.
‘arranged marriage’ is rare nowadays
my marriage was arranged by parents, it was horrible, i am so lucky my husband has just died in car accident !
“Sounds more like a blind date than an arranged marriage”
That is a good analogy and sort of how it’s supposed to work. Family members, usually parents, try and find a match based on what they know of you and of the other person too (compatibility, family background, religion, etc) and then see how you get along. Of course this does not mean the Hollyweird way of finding out, i.e. hopping in to bed the first time you meet someone (or any time before marriage!) :)
Of course as in all human endeavors there are always people who bend the rules for their own purposes and it becomes a money game for some or a way to get rid of girls etc, but that is not how it’s supposed to be.
Done properly it works out quite well, has worked for my parents who just celebrated their 36th wedding anniversary, and has worked well for me, my 8th anniversary will be next week.
But this child marriage stuff is wrong and glad this little girl stood up to it. I guess we can assume they were Hindu and not Religion of ‘Piece’ (tm) advocates or she would probably be dead as opposed to her parents acquiescing to her demands.
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