Voluntary Self Identification

[dareon]

Hi,

I've been on the site a lot for the last few years but have just been a stalker really. Sometimes I wanted to comment but didn't care that much. Anyways I am getting a little worried about my job so I have been starting to put out resumes. With larger companies with "diversity" policies they invite you for "voluntary self identification". I am a white male and I feel like that can not help their diversity. I have been doing it but don't want to be discriminated against. Anyone have any thoughts on this or have any direct HR experience dealing with this?

Thanks for the help. Also anyone know any entry level to 3 year EE jobs in Charlotte NC or western NC

[Vendome]

Thanks for showing up and here is my response:

You swine. You vulgar little maggot. Don’t you know that you are pathetic? You worthless bag of filth. As we say in Texas, I’ll bet you couldn’t pour piss out of a boot with instructions on the heel. You are a canker. A sore that won’t go away. I would rather kiss a lawyer than be seen with you.

You are a fiend and a coward, and you have bad breath. You are degenerate, noxious and depraved. I feel debased just for knowing you exist. I despise everything about you. You are a bloody nardless newbie twit protohominid chromosomally aberrant caricature of a coprophagic cloacal parasitic pond scum and I wish you would go away.

You’re a putrescence mass, a walking vomit. You are a spineless little worm deserving nothing but the profoundest contempt. You are a jerk, a cad, a weasel. Your life is a monument to stupidity. You are a stench, a revulsion, a big suck on a sour lemon.

You are a bleating fool, a curdled staggering mutant dwarf smeared richly with the effluvia and offal accompanying your alleged birth into this world. An insensate, blinking calf, meaningful to nobody, abandoned by the puke-drooling, giggling beasts who sired you and then killed themselves in recognition of what they had done.

I will never get over the embarrassment of belonging to the same species as you. You are a monster, an ogre, a malformity. I barf at the very thought of you. You have all the appeal of a paper cut. Lepers avoid you. You are vile, worthless, less than nothing. You are a weed, a fungus, the dregs of this earth. And did I mention you smell?

If you aren’t an idiot, you made a world-class effort at simulating one. Try to edit your writing of unnecessary material before attempting to impress us with your insight. The evidence that you are a nincompoop will still be available to readers, but they will be able to access it more rapidly.

You snail-skulled little rabbit. Would that a hawk pick you up, drive its beak into your brain, and upon finding it rancid set you loose to fly briefly before spattering the ocean rocks with the frothy pink shame of your ignoble blood. May you choke on the queasy, convulsing nausea of your own trite, foolish beliefs.

You are weary, stale, flat and unprofitable. You are grimy, squalid, nasty and profane. You are foul and disgusting. You’re a fool, an ignoramus. Monkeys look down on you. Even sheep won’t have sex with you. You are unreservedly pathetic, starved for attention, and lost in a land that reality forgot.

And what meaning do you expect your delusionally self-important statements of unknowing, inexperienced opinion to have with us? What fantasy do you hold that you would believe that your tiny-fisted tantrums would have more weight than that of a leprous desert rat, spinning rabidly in a circle, waiting for the bite of the snake?

You are a waste of flesh. You have no rhythm. You are ridiculous and obnoxious. You are the moral equivalent of a leech. You are a living emptiness, a meaningless void. You are sour and senile. You are a disease, you puerile one-handed slack-jawed drooling meatslapper.

On a good day you’re a half-wit. You remind me of drool. You are deficient in all that lends character. You have the personality of wallpaper. You are dank and filthy. You are asinine and benighted. You are the source of all unpleasantness. You spread misery and sorrow wherever you go.

I cannot believe how incredibly stupid you are. I mean rock-hard stupid. Dehydrated-rock-hard stupid. Stupid so stupid that it goes way beyond the stupid we know into a whole different dimension of stupid. You are trans-stupid stupid. Meta-stupid. Stupid collapsed on itself so far that even the neutrons have collapsed. Stupid gotten so dense that no intellect can escape. Singularity stupid. Blazing hot mid-day sun on Mercury stupid. You emit more stupid in one second than our entire galaxy emits in a year. Quasar stupid. Your writing has to be a troll. Nothing in our universe can really be this stupid. Perhaps this is some primordial fragment from the original big bang of stupid. Some pure essence of a stupid so uncontaminated by anything else as to be beyond the laws of physics that we know. I’m sorry. I can’t go on. This is an epiphany of stupid for me. After this, you may not hear from me again for a while. I don’t have enough strength left to deride your ignorant questions and half baked comments about unimportant trivia, or any of the rest of this drivel. Duh.

The only thing worse than your logic is your manners. I have snipped away most of what you wrote, because, well... it didn’t really say anything. Your attempt at constructing a creative post was pitiful. I mean, really, stringing together a bunch of crap among a load of babbling was hardly effective... Maybe later in life, after you have learned to read, write, spell, and count, you will have more success. True, these are rudimentary skills that many of us “normal” people take for granted that everyone has an easy time of mastering. But we sometimes forget that there are “challenged” persons in this world who find these things more difficult. If I had known, that this was your case then I would have never read your post. It just wouldn’t have been “right”. Sort of like parking in a handicap space. I wish you the best of luck in the emotional, and social struggles that seem to be placing such a demand on you.

[meadsjn]

One more thing — if you “accidently” woke up with visible tattoos, facial piercings, bones through your nose and ears, rings through your lips, you might be S.O.L.

[Liberty Valance]

“The trouble ain't that there is too many fools, but that the
lightning ain't distributed right.”

~ Mark Twain ~

[VeniVidiVici]

A white friend of mine from South Africa put on his college app that he was an African-American.

Don’t lie. Be creative!

[voteNRA]

LOL

what "pile-on" generator did you use for that one?

I've used this one before automatic complaint-letter generator but yours has that extra little personal edge to it.

[machogirl]

wow, i don’t think i’ve seen so many adjectives in one post. ;)

[Shimmer1]

tell them you’re a native American.

[Huebolt]

I've used this one before automatic complaint-letter generator but yours has that extra little personal edge to it...

WOW, it made this:

I have read some of Pres. Obama's writings. While I disagree with much of their content, I do not intend to attack Pres. Obama's opinions, only to offer my own viewpoints. For the sake of review, by comparing today to even ten years ago and projecting the course we're on, I'd say we're in for an even more hate-filled, featherbrained, and venal society, all thanks to Pres. Obama's précis.

The most sobering aspect of Pres. Obama's stances is that Pres. Obama's occasional demonstrations of benevolence are not genuine. Nor are his promises. In fact, Pres. Obama does, occasionally, make a valid point. But when he says that honor counts for nothing, that's where the facts end and the ludicrousness begins. I have a dream, a mission, a set path that I would like to travel down. Specifically, my goal is to scrap the entire constellation of pertinacious ideas that brought us to our present point. Of course, I act based on what I think is right, not who I think is right. That's why I try always to establish a supportive—rather than an intimidating—atmosphere for offering public comment. It's also why I say that Pres. Obama has spent untold hours trying to change the course of history. During that time, did it ever once occur to him that we are indeed living in crapulous times? I would venture the answer has something to do with academicism. To elaborate, his lickspittles don't want us to place a high value on honor and self-respect. That'd be too much of a threat to radicalism, charlatanism, and all of the other nutty things they worship. Clearly, they prefer turning schemers loose against us good citizens. If everyone does his own, small part, together we can tell Pres. Obama what we all think of him—and boy, do I have some choice words I'd like to use. While there's no dispute that he's litigious and probably a little uninformed, he's also cunning, implacable, fanatic, and ruthless. Why else would Pres. Obama keep us perennially behind the eight ball? Truth be told, it seems that no one else is telling you that he is opposed to free enterprise, individual liberty, trial by jury, and even such post-Westphalian notions as national sovereignty. So, since the burden lies with me to tell you that, I suppose I should say a few words on the subject. To begin with, Pres. Obama leaves me no choice but to suggest that his legacy be hanged and drawn and quartered and paraded through the streets in small, chopped-up little bits and thrown out into the fields where no clean animal will touch it. To top that off, I have some advice for him. He should keep his mouth shut until he stops being such an unrealistic spouter and starts being at least one of informative, agreeable, creative, or entertaining. Now that I've said what I had to say, I should remark that this letter may not endear me to some people. Indeed, it may even cost me a friend or two. However, friends do not let friends get trampled by namby-pamby, obtrusive extortionists like Pres. Obama. The truth is the truth and we pay a steep price whenever we ignore it.

(very slightly edited...)

[Vendome]

That chump is going to be ZOT’d anyway.

just some kid who decided to sign up and never bothered to come back.

[Vendome]

Borrowed it from another Freeper, who used it another dork
ZOT’O the other day.

[voteNRA]

Ha!

That letter worked out perfectly, I think the guy that put that "generator" together has done a little work recently. When I last used it a year or so ago, the finished product was nothing like that.

I suggest you send that to your local paper under some goofy name and see if the editor is willing to put it in print.

[Huebolt]

When I last used it a year or so ago, the finished product was nothing like that.

I DID have to edit it. It had a very liberal closing phrase, so hasn't really changed. The author is probably an obama-sodomite (or sodomee?), or worse.

(I can usually come up with an insult, if necessary. Comes from receiving so many... : )

[my_pointy_head_is_sharp]

Maybe it’s just me, but I find the term ‘mulatto’ to be offensive. Yet some FReepers seem to use it freely. Must be an old-timer thing.

[irishtenor]

That’s what I do.

[Shimmer1]

What do you do?

[irishtenor]

Put in Native American. I was born here.

[dareon]

Thanks for all the replies to this post. After I posted it I couldn’t find it on the forum anywhere with searching. I though it didn’t like my post because I had just registered or something. While as an EE I don’t think I’m going to be that bad off getting a job most positions seem to want 5+ years of experience or a PE of which I have neither.