Just Say No: The 10 Worst-Sounding New TV Pilots

Yahoo ^ | 3/23/10 | Angel Cohn

[DemforBush]

We love TV network pilot season because it's filled with such potential. So many shows in their infancy, casting announcements flying around, the anticipation of something new from our favorite showrunners... But while many of the announced pilots already have us praying for full-season pick-ups, there are plenty of others that we hate based on what little we know about them. Here are the potential shows that we hope don't make it to the fall lineup...

[DemforBush]

I don't watch much tv to begin with, but boy howdy do these sound awful.

#1 will probably be especially bad. A show about a Republican pundit? Yeah, I'm sure that will be handled with even-handedness. *rolls eyes*

"S--t My Dad Says" is funny stuff on Facebook, but I don't see how it's going to translate to a tv series, even with the mighty Shatner on board (Happy belated 79th, Bill!)

The only reason to tune in to the remake of Hawaii Five-O is for the off chance of seeing Grace Park (Battlestar Galactica) in a bikini.

[353FMG]

I can truly say that I have not watched one second of the ten shows mentioned and I don’t plan to do so in the future.

[kaylar]

10. "Kindreds" (NBC) A grouchy patent lawyer and a group of oddball associates work at a quirky law practice. Yeah, we like Kathy Bates, Ben Chaplin, and Brittany Snow but this seems like the most predictable David E. Kelley show yet. We can do without another "Ally McBeal."

Hollywood agent pitching this : "It's just like House, but with lawyers!"

Good grief...I thought all the movies remaking old(er) tv series were bad enough, then the "live action" remakes of cartoon, now we're recycling TV series while the originals aren't even canceled? Now that's what I call a "vast wasteland".

[absolootezer0]

#1 will probably be especially bad. A show about a Republican pundit? Yeah, I'm sure that will be handled with even-handedness. *rolls eyes*

considering its starring someone who's "claim to fame" is playing an ultra-lib, jewish, roomate/ best friend of a gay man. (there's a name for that, but would prolly get the comment pulled)

[cammie]

Yeah, problem is, if you’re dying, you’ll put up with House...if you’re in need of a lawyer, you’ll keep on walking past the grouch!

[KarlInOhio]

There haven't been a set of pilots less likely to come back for a second mission since the Kamikazes.

[JeffChrz]

Spin the TV Pilot wheels!

Wheel #1: professions: medical, law firm, police
Wheel #2: location: New York, Los Angeles, Boston, current hip location (Seattle, Miami, Las Vegas)
Wheel #3: story perspective: young-1st-job-hire, old-been-there-done-that, underling (secretary, nurse, etc.)

Throw in some minorities and non-straight characters.

That describes 98% of network dramas since 1970.

[kaylar]

Good point! :-)

[TomGuy]

8 out of 10 would be pulled before the 4th episode aired.

None sound like winners.

Hawaii, Five-O? Dear Lord [Jack, that is. There is only one Steve McGarrett. Just like there is only one TV Perry Mason. Immitations need not apply.]

[Gay State Conservative]

I've been saying “no” to network programming since Steve left Married With Children.

[massgopguy]

Body of Evidence with Dana Delaney. Just as I suspected. Desperate Housewives is going to kill off Delaney by the Lesbian Stripper who she just made leave. Ironic, she was trying to kill Mike because he dumped her to go back with Terri Hatcher.

[Ax]

If it has a laugh-track, it gets passed by. There are a few exceptions: reruns of “M*A*S*H,” “Seinfeld,” “Fraser.”

[TokuMei]

What’s a TV?

[Jack Wilson]

My favorite sitcoms have been the ones that must have sounded like crap when originally shopped to the networks.

Bunch of guys hang around a bar talking: Cheers

Four friends hang around at an apartment or coffee shop: Seinfeld

[kaylar]

Oh, GOD, THIS ditto X 10,000!!!!! Loathe laugh tracks ! Studio recorded laughter from the audience I can *tolerate* , but laugh tracks -laughter just dubbed in on allegedly funny lines? I HATED that even when my age was still in single digits!

[TankerKC]

Will it be a good as  Monty  starring Henry Winkler as a “Conservative talk-show host, a la Rush Limbaugh”? It made it to 4 episodes back in ’94.

[GeronL]

I hate 99% of TV

[GeronL]

Sitcoms all seem to be about people telling lame sex jokes.

Nothing I want to see.

[GeronL]

That was a strange place to draw the line.

[BossLady]

I was so bored by American TV that I ordered a code free DVD player and just bought the complete 'Spooks' TV series from Amazon.UK - also called 'MI-5' shown cut to shreds on PBS once a week. The series ROCKS!!!!! I have several more UK series on deck that I will be ordering as well.

(I ordered a code free dvd player AND the complete series from the UK AND still had over $75 savings over buying the series repackaged as MI-5 from Amazon.US!!!)