Posted on 02/03/2010 11:44:17 AM PST by sig226
Dear Super Bowl Visitor:
Welcome to Miami! Get ready for a fun Super Bowl week, because you're going to see some serious partying ``Miami Style'' -- people eating, drinking, singing, shouting, fighting, discharging firearms, sacrificing animals, sinking motor yachts and dancing naked around burning buses. And those are our police officers.
But don't worry! You are perfectly safe. Miami has been hosting Super Bowls for more than 150 years, and in all that time no harm has ever come to a visitor who didn't do something stupid such as venture outside the hotel. So have fun! Here are some tips to help you make the most of your visit:
GETTING AROUND
Miami has an extensive mass-transit system. Unfortunately, it doesn't go anywhere you need to go, and it sometimes has sharks on it. (You think I'm kidding.)
Miami also has a modern taxi fleet, which consists of four modern taxis, but they're pretty busy. So your best bet is to rent a car. Keep in mind that Miami has the same traffic laws as the rest of the United States; the difference is that nobody here obeys them. The main expressways are Interstate 95 and the Palmetto; do not use these unless you are an experienced fighter pilot.
(Excerpt) Read more at miamiherald.com ...
Dave Barry for President!
He gets us;)
It is like driving in Mexico City. Everyone makes up their own laws as they go along.
I’ve driven in Miami before. * shudders at the memory *
Where a lot of residents came from.
Amazing...and kinda unnerving at times.
Just count your lucky stars if there are no traffic circles in your area. I live in an area with a very significant Hispanic demographic, a very significant Middle East demographic and a very significant African demographic. Large parts of the world apparently have never heard of turn signals, and are unclear on the whole green-yellow-red light concept, the “speed limit” concept and the “don’t double park or park on the sidewalk,” concept, the idea that one shouldn’t make a u-turn in the middle of a block, and think that they get extra points from the Virgin of Guadalupe and/or Allah for cutting off other drivers. etc.
Last time I drove around Miami a car pulled up to me at the stoplight and both the passenger and driver were wearing crash helmets.
No, actually, unlike the southwest US, most of the Hispanic residents here don’t come from Mexico (if you speak Spanish, you can tell from their accents.) They do however come from a LOT of other places:Cuba, Dominican Republic, Colombia, Peru, Panama, Costa Rica, Chile, Argentina, Uruguay. El Salvador, Honduras, Nicaragua... (not including a significant Haitian population).
The thing is as a local pundit once noted, everyone here drives according to the rules of their country of origin.
(Incidentally, I would point out that unlike the Mexicans, people from many of these places are more conservative; they did after all come here to get away from the Chavez’s, Ortegas, Kirchners, Correas, Morales’s etc of the world).
We have the same problem in SW Texas (Northern Mexico) at 4 way stops they all wait for someone to make a move and then they all go.
That was you? I thought you looked familiar.
/grin
How do they get a drivers license then? I live in Hollywood and most of these people probably got their license from 7-11.
In DC they just bribe somebody. And I am not making that up.
Actually, that’s our other danger...there is a big roundabout at a large intersection; the city insists on keeping it for “asthetics”. Wifey will drive the half-mile detour to avoid it entirely.
They were buying illegal DLs from the gummint in Palm Beach County.
Some of them in DC you can avoid by taking a tunnel under them. I bless the person who thought of that, especially during peak bus route hours, because the bus drivers are drawn from the same pool of unskilled drivers as the general population, and occasionally run down pedestrians not to mention run into other vehicles.
Were they Japanese, and did the passenger speak with a bad Howard Cosell accent?
When I did the SCCA driver school, one instructor, an Indy 500 racer, went on a rant saying if were up to him everyone on a public highway would be required to wear a helmet. I guess he convinced someone.
I hate Miami. Its right up there with Atlanta as the worst place to visit or live.
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