Man Violates Migratory Game Bird Treaty Over Ice Cream

Field and Stream ^ | May 27, 2009 | Field Notes

[yankeedame]

May 27, 2009

Man Violates Migratory Game Bird Treaty Over Ice Cream

Here’s a little pop quiz: A Heermann’s gull poops on your head and then goes after your wife’s ice cream. You should:

• A. Wipe your head off and go get more ice cream
• B. Run the bird off
• C. Beat the bird off with a stick

Answer: Not C! And here’s why, from the Orange County Register:

A Kansas man is contesting a $275 fine by the U.S. Fish and Wildlife for attacking a rare gull in Laguna Beach when the bird tried to steal his wife's ice cream. . . .

Fish and Wildlife officials say [Dragan] Djuric violated the federal Migratory Bird Treaty Act when he beat a Heermann's gull with a stick New Year's Eve. Heermann's gulls are listed under the act. . . .

[A] Fish and Wildlife Service review of the witness statements showed that the ice cream fell on its own and when the birds came to eat it, Djuric hit the birds with a stick, Ed Newcomer with the Fish and Wildlife said. The birds were not attacking and Djuric's actions were not in self-defense, he said.

Feed us or we'll poop on you!

[BenLurkin]

The Migratory Game Bird Treaty is a good example of how treaties are used to deprive Americans of Constitutional governance.

And no, I'm not a bird hater. But the use of treaties to undermine our citizenship is despicable.

[allmost]

I guess the ‘I was protecting my wife from avian flu’ defense was not tried.

[mamelukesabre]

So he never even killed the stupid bird? He just took a few swipes at it to scare it off?

[proudpapa]

Hey. If I was protected by the Federal Gov’t, I might be tempted to steal her ice cream, too.

Especially if it was Pralines & Cream!

[SouthDixie]

Liberals will find anything to feel hurt and mistreated about...

[Clock King]

Here’s hoping liberal authorities get their eyes pecked out by some protected bird.

[MIchaelTArchangel]

If this Kansan wants to do some real good, he ought to get a baseball bat and Sopranoize the “people” (I use that term rather loosely) at the Fish and Wildlife Service. Those “people” are in charge of opening “National Wildlife Refuges” around the country which attract human smugglers and drug smugglers because they are largely unpatrolled. They also act as sanctuaries for diseases such as rabies, Eastern Equine Encephalitis, Lime disease, etc. And once one of those cesspools is opened, they are impossible to close!

[mickey finn]

Nothing more humiliating than being crapped on by a sea pigeon. It has happened to me when I was eating lunch once. But my friend was fishing on the Oregon coast when he looked up to yell at the squawking gulls. When he was done the others in the boat were in hysterics. The dirty bird had placed one right in his mouth, and he did not even see it. Then he noticed something salty and gritty in his mouth. He hates seagulls.

[Jeff Chandler]