Posted on 05/10/2009 9:05:03 PM PDT by chasio649
In a recent column on the Huffington Post, "Why I'm Single," writer Lea Lane lists all the reasons that she's still single. Why? So she can send the URL to all the nosy, possibly well-meaning busy-bodies who keep asking her why she isn't in a relationship.
Lane presents a persuasive case; it almost made me wish for the days I, too, had the whole bed to myself. She's one of what I'll call the "Happies," women who are perfectly content with their single status.
They don't want for a companion; they love their solitude and have enough friends, hobbies, and passions to keep themselves busy.
Although, most Happies, like Lane, are "open to options, and do understand the beauty and wonder -- and blessing -- of a good relationship," they neither actively seek one nor passively hope and pray one comes their way. The Happies say they don't need a relationship to be content, and, by God, they mean it.
On the other side of the single lady spectrum, you've got the "Crappies." They're the single ladies with really crappy attitudes. Take, for example, Jezebel's Megan Carpentier, who responded to Lane's column with a list of her own, a list that not only doesn't make me a little nostalgic for my single days, it makes me sort of, well, sad -- for her.
I'm sad for the Crappies, because, as much as they say
(Excerpt) Read more at cnn.com ...
Exactly! I have one digital drum set in my home office and an acoustic set in the family room. A girlfriend said one time :"you know if you were married these wouldn't be here" and I said "yeah I know that's why I'm not married anymore"....:o)
Hey I'm 58 and I date women my age....but nice if they have implants so their boobs don't point at the ground!
A glass of wine is even better. I can sit through almost anything with a little help from alcohol!...:o)
Yes, there is something to be said for a woman that can go moose hunting in the morning, a Harley ride in the afternoon, then get into an elegant dress for a fine dinner, and dancing in the evening.
Being a guy I cannot really say I have a voice in this post, but I will comment anyway. I have married, twice, and I will tell you this, it is lonely out here in single land, especially when you get older. I divorced the firs one because she was fooling around on me, the second one because she said she wanted other men but felt guilty about doing it while still married to me. I guess I should give her credit for that, however, I wish to be married again, with a woman who appreciates me, but I don’t think I will because women seem to be just a trifle fickle to me(just joking, what they really seem like are unsatisfied whores)
...and why can’t men just shut up for once and listen ...
Well we can be bossy too ... but then I do like football and bbq’s with beer and loud music and guys acting silly ... so ....
BS
Do you even know any Oriental women?
I've never met one who wasn't free-thinking, and I've certainly never met any slaves.
And I've known some who are clearer-thinking than their husbands.
Naw...alcohol only makes things ‘appear’ better than reality.
It all balances out in the end. Thats what makea a relationship work.
I have known a couple of guys who married Oriental women They gave almost the same answer. They like them because they know their place and they dont have to put up the the BS that American women cause.
Hey, if someone wants to marry one, its still America. IMHO, American women are tops, followed closely by Scottish women and those from Down Under.
I've known some who treated their husbands pretty badly, but I've also known some who try their best to make their marriages work.
I've never seen any slaves. I have seen women who make contributions to the marriage. It varies from person to person.
But, most of them expect to work in their marriage, but they expect the same from the husbands. No slavery here.
If I find her I just might consider marriage again!
Just one glass...just enough to take the sting out of a possible bad situation..:o)
I really don't understand the lonely thing. Unless someone is use to mostly focusing on just one other person. If one has "game" there are always plenty of women around. And what about friends? My friends keep me really busy too. And hobbies and interests? I also have things I probably wouldn't have married like an airplane and hangars...a Harley...a nice house with a music room full of drums and amps and guitars etc. etc. Many women (and some men) would call that selfish and immature. They are welcome to their opinion. I have always failed to see how devoting your life to and trying to make happy a particular female makes one mature. We are supposed to accept gay marriage and at the same time we deride the single lifestyle.
I still have great health (weight just five pounds more than I did when I was in college). I have a more than adequate income so I do not lack for "toys" that I really want. But then, I really don't enjoy "toys" that much any anymore. Lately I get more satisfaction out of walking out to my backyard and watching our peach, apricot, and pear orchard come into bloom than I do scanning the Internet on my iTouch or playing old Led Zeppelin songs the Les Paul guitar that I have sitting in the music room.
I get the most satisfaction out of holding my three year old granddaughters, teasing them gently until they laugh, and listening for the new and fresh observations they make about the world ("Grandpa, you have stripes like a tiger!" while looking intently at my forehead and touching the wrinkles on my forehead with her tiny hand).
There have been times when my wife has been away, all the children and the grandchildren are away, and I am alone in our home with just the silence and my "toys." I imagine this loneliness must be what hell is really like.
But human relationships tend to be flawed and fragile because human beings are flawed and fragile. I beat the odds. My marriage could have turned out otherwise, my kids might have turned out other than they did. And then I might be finding relatively greater satisfaction in a single life--in toys and dating a series of single women in an attempt to fill the void. That's not where I'm at, so I don't understand it.
My guiding philosophy, validated through my own life experiences, is that traditional marriage, marital fidelity, and the rearing of children through that faithful union, is the best life--one designed by God for that reason.
That is a good philosophy if one is able to find a mate who honors fidelity and the marital contract in general....one you want to have children with...and appreciates the joy of raising those children and all that brings. Unfortunately some don't find that. I was just adding that if you don't there is nothing wrong with the single life. I can list my rewards as you have and it is all a matter of perspective. Watching apricots bloom doesn't interest me as much as cruising to Catalina Island at 5000 feet on a beautiful day in my classic Cessna 195 for a "$100 hamburger" with a hot blonde in the right seat. I do agree about the Les Paul (I'm a Telecaster/Rolling Stones freak) though. You sound like you have a wonderful life but I feel I do also. If I would have found someone trustworthy to start a family with I would have gone that path myself. Consider yourself very lucky what with the divorce rate at 50% (and who knows what the rate would be if every marriage that suffered infidelity ended in divorce). Without trust you have nothing in my opinion. One has no way of knowing if 30 years down the road their spouse is going to run off with the pool boy or meter maid. You are totally at the mercy of another person's whims and philosophy changes so a major part of a success such as yours is blind luck. Not to say it didn't take devotion and hard work on your part but you can't control everything or shape a life shared by two into your personal vision of a happy and successful existence. Partnerships are wonderful when they work....but not all do and they can fail for an unlimited number of reasons totally beyond one's control.
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